


The lost Prince

by LBC_jrock_fanfiction



Category: Plastic Tree, arimura ryutaro, tadashi hasegawa
Genre: Alternate Universe - Historical, M/M, Mental Health Issues, Pining
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-13
Updated: 2019-12-13
Packaged: 2021-02-18 16:13:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 26,708
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21780241
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LBC_jrock_fanfiction/pseuds/LBC_jrock_fanfiction
Summary: Ryutaro, a strange orphan in a medieval town in Germany and of unknown origin, is discovered by the Police and taken care of by lawyer Akira. The poor kids' circumstances make him famous over night and all kind of people take an interest in him.... with good and bad intentions.A/N: This story is vaguely based on the true story of Kaspar Hauser (Germany, around the 1820's). You can research his story after you are done reading this fiction, to keep yourself from possible spoilers. The story is quite sad and well known in Germany and to this day unsolved. For the fiction's sake, I had to use the Japanese names for the charakters in an old German setting which feels terribly wrong but was necessary for understanding. I'm also sorry for any grammar and language mistakes because I have no beta reader.Also, I recently suck at writing anything nearly romantic which comes naturally with age and disappointment, well... But I wanted to write this so I hope you enjoy it a little bit. The Queen of Angst is back *swinging my black little flag
Relationships: Arimura Ryuutarou/Hasegawa Tadashi
Kudos: 1





	1. Chapter 1

Nuremberg, Germany  
26th May 1828

It was a beautiful day in the old medieval town of Nuremberg in Germany. The sun shone beautifully over the little houses, its picturesque cobblestone alleys and the colorful adorned trees and flower arrangements. It was the day of Whitsun and the church had just rang its bells to announce the end of its service. The town was filled with laughter, playing children, the sound of horses and dogs barking. Maids pulled up the beddings of their Masters from the opened windows while lunch was cooked on their stoves. A perfect image of a large city.... almost perfect.

Uneven steps echoed through a little alley of the old town. Wobbly, like from a drunkard but this young boy was far from drunk. He had difficulties to walk and hold his balance, the sun made it hard for him to see and in his tender but dirty little hands he hold two letters... which he was unable to read. The noises, animals, humans were all strange to him and he was frightened. It was the fear which kept him going to an unknown destination. There was one name though. A name he had been taught before he was released into the wild: Police officer

An old woman stopped in front of him with a look of utter confusion. She asked where the boy was headed to and all he was able to say was 'Police officer'. She pointed him the way and the strange boy made his way up the alley to the house where the old lady had pointed to. There he remained standing in front of the door, without a clue of what to do. He never heard of knocking or even ringing a doorbell before.  
It took the neighbours no more then ten minutes to contact the local police officer of his strange visitor in front of his door. They did the ringing and gathered in a small group around the boy since he didn't respond to any of their questions. He looked at the people like a frightened fawn, his slim frame shaking. And they looked back at the pale, thin boy. His dark brown eyes were partly covered by his dark, half-long hair, his lips were without color. He looked very sick and neglected.  
The police officer opened the door and with his bushy eyebrows, he looked down onto the little boy... and the noise of all people speaking at the same time made the boy almost loose his mind.  
He dropped the letters and covered his ears. Slowly, he went down onto his knees and before he knew it, he lost consciousness.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

It was the next morning at the supreme court of town.  
President and highest lawyer of the supreme court in Nuremberg, Akira Nakayama, sat behind his desk where he worked tirelessly on a revised edition of laws against torture for the Free State of Bavaria. The sleepless nights remained uncounted but his dear wife understood and took good care of their kids because this work was for the greater good.  
It was early in the morning when Akira realized that something was strange. People were whispering on the corridor and when a unit of the detectives left in a hurry, Akira put his pen down. He walked out of his office, with his monocle on the right eye. There he caught the first group of secretaries.

“What is this commotion all about?”

“Sir,” the Lady said, “didn't you hear of the strange boy who was found in front of the police officers' house yesterday?”

Akira shook his head. “No, what happened?”

“That's all we know. They found him and put him into the tower of the castle of Nuremberg.”

Akira turned around immediately and stormed back into his office to get his coat and hat. That would explain the absence of the police officer this morning and he would find out what was going on.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

It was a day almost too warm for May when Akira made his way through town to the castle of Nuremberg. Before he went around the corner, he could already hear the mob of people talking and discussing loudly before the castle's closed doors. He had to fight his way through the crowd and found the main entrance to be closed. Without hesitating, he went around the castle to the back entrance and rang the bell there. One of the castle's staff looked through one of the windows and recognized the high lawyer of town. They opened the door and Akira stormed into the registration office of the castle. There he also found the main Police Officer. 

“Officer...” Was all Akira was able to huff out loud and the older man clapped Akira's shoulder sympathetically. They were old colleagues and hold each other in high regard.

“I knew you would come here eventually.” The old man said to Akira.

“I just heard about the boy this morning... what happened?”

The old Officer guided Akira back into one of the rooms and closed the door behind them. He offered Akira a seat. “Yesterday, a strange and sickly looking boy showed up at my porch. According to the locals, he was looking for me but when asked he couldn't say a single word. He looks neglected, mentally disabled and he fainted when it became too much for him. He had two letters in his hands which were both addressed to me.” The police officer took the letters out of his coat pocket and handed them to Akira. They were written in quite a beautiful hand.  
The first letter was written by an unknown, old maid who explained herself that she got pregnant and couldn't care for the child. The second letter was written by an unknown day labourer who was left in charge of the boy until the boy was old enough to start an apprenticeship, preferably at the police officers' department.  
Akira looked up from the letters and the first thing he said was: “These letters are a hoax.”  
The old Officer gave a one sided smile. “I thought that you would say that.”  
Akira looked at the letters again: “Day labourer's are unable to read and write. And if they could, then not in such a beautiful hand.” Akira kept silent for a moment and thought about something before he continued: “How old do you think he is?”

“He looks very young, maybe 14 but I guess that he could be older.”

“Wait,” Akira turned the letter around, “I think I saw a date in the letter..... there: This so called maid claims that the boy was born on the 30th of April 1812... which would make him 16 years old now.”

“He doesn't look like it.”

“Show me the boy.” 

And Akira followed the police officer up the castle to the towers, where special prisoners were kept.  
The room in the tower was divided by iron bars and a tiny window with no glass allowed a little of sunshine into the room. Nevertheless, the room was too crowded with people working in the castle and the Police Officer and Akira had trouble to enter the room. A loud shout from the Officer and the room was emptied.... there, in the darkest corner of the tiny cell, a fragile white bundle with dark hair and rags for clothing, sat crouched as far away from the bars as possible. Akira had never seen something so vulnerable in his entire life time before. Slowly, he walked closer to the bars and lowered down to look into the boys face. In fear, the boy had his face covered with his arms.  
Akira looked up at the Officer who gestured him to continue. With a low voice, Akira spoke to the boy: “Young man.... what is your name?” Slowly, the boy lowered his arms but he didn't speak. He looked at Akira in utter shock.

“Don't waste your time Mr. Nakayama, we asked him a hundred questions but all he does is looking back at us. We figured that the boy is mute.”

“But he can hear me... clearly, no one ever taught him how to speak before.... have you tried to test his writing?”

The Officer snorted. “Come on, he cannot talk, how should he be able to write?”

Akira thought about it for a moment and fished out a tiny book and pen from his pocket.

“I know what that means...” The old Officer said. “You are hooked.”

Akira opened his notebook and started taking notes about the boys appearance the day before and his physical features. “Would you mind helping the boy up?” Akira said and the officer gave a nod. The moment he rattled with his keys to open the iron bars and clanged with them against them, the boy winced visibly. Akira then said, whether the boy understood his words or not: “Don't be afraid. We will help you.” Maybe it was the tone of his voice that calmed the boy a little.  
The police officer reached for the boy's arm and Akira gestured him to do so slowly. Then he guided the boy up from the floor, walked a few steps with him to the nearby bed and settled him down on it. His steps were wobbly, his body starved and the fact that he would rather sleep on the ground then on the bed showed Akira that this boy must have been kept in captivity. All in all, this young boy was in a pitiable state. And he needed protection.  
Akira went inside the cell as well and lowered down onto his knees in front of the boy. Slowly, he gave him his pen and to his astonishment, he held it in a right position. He stretched out his notebook to the boy and said: “Can you write?”  
Insecure and slow, the boy lowered the pen onto paper and to the grown men's astonishment, he wrote two words in uneven letters: RYUTARO ARIMURA

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

The stayed with the boy for another thirty minutes and after Akira was done with physical and mental check ups, they found out that apart from his mute, starved and apathetic state, he seemed physically normal.  
The boy was normally fed by the police staff and they brought him paper and pen to write, on command of Akira who wanted to see whether the boy would communicate this way.  
On his way down to the main halls of the castle, Akira said to the Police Officer: “You can clearly see that the boy needs to be taken out of the cells.”

“And you know by law that we have to keep him inside the cell until a possible blood related person or Guardian has been found.”

Akira closed his notebook and shoved it back into his coat. “I know. And I will work on that.” The police officer nodded. “Until then, keep the boy in peace and save. A doctor should see him as well.”

“This has already been arranged.” The old Officer said. 

“We must try to silence the working staff of this castle and the police force. A scandal over a lost boy is the last thing we need right now.”

But it was to no avail. Within days the whole town new about the mysterious mute boy who was found in front of the Police Officer's house. The upcoming days, people were storming to the castle gates, trying to catch a glimpse of the wild boy but the staff did their best in keeping the visitors off the grounds. The boy was stressed enough by the indoor workers which gathered in front of his cell to talk to him, look at him and provoke him to do something... like in a circus.

Akira didn't know of any of this. The first thing he did was going into the town's archive to check the birth dates in the old towns' church books but to no avail. No boy with this name was born inside the town of Nuremberg which meant that he must have been born somewhere else.  
This new case stressed him so much that the had a talk with his wife at the same evening. To get this Ryutaro-boy out of jail, he needed a lawful Guardian to take care of him. He would have loved to take the boy in but his wife was expecting their third child and their town house was already small enough. The boy needed someone sensible, kind but intelligent, someone who could teach him the basics in writing, speaking, Math and history.... And Akira just knew whom he had to talk to.

A few days after his visit at the castle cell, Akira went to his old friend Kentaro Sato, a well known and liked secondary school teacher who lived not far outside town in a more rural area.  
Kenken, how his friends called him, lived alone with his wife in a picturesque little stone house with a surrounding garden. The favour Akira had to ask him was not an easy one but necessary.

Kentaro was surprised about Akira's visit and they took a seat in the living room to have a talk. 

“Akira, what brings you here my old friend?”

Akira always carried an aura of a scholar with him but today he seemed slightly nervous.  
“You must have heard about that strange boy who lives imprisoned in the town castle.”

“Yes?” Kenken answered. “It's hard to listen to anything else these days...” He paused. “I should have known that you are involved in this case.”

Akira scratched his head. “Well, I will attend to it personally because this is a case of emergency. I took pity in that boy.” Akira told Kenken everything: About the letters, his condition and all observations. Slowly, Kenken had an inkling where this was pointing to... “You don't think that I should take the boy in?”

“Kenken! There is no better person fit to help an abandoned, poor boy like Ryutaro. I would take the boy in myself but my house is already full with children.” Akira didn't give him the chance to retort. “I will be his legal Guardian, cover his expenses. All I ask of you is a tiny place for him to stay and most importantly: Someone who teaches him in all subjects necessary. Writing, Math and so on.... The police officer and I are hoping that as soon as the boy is able to write, maybe he will be able to speak and tell us what happened to him.”

Kentaro remained silent and thought about it before he continued. “I need to have a word with my wife first but I will inform you as soon as possible.”

And with that, Akira left Kentaro again with a smile on his face.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Akira was called back into the castle cell two weeks afterwards.  
Until that point, he had worked restless on this poor boy's case and managed to get all the legal papers in order. Of course there were no legal parents found and Akira made himself his legal Guardian. With the Police Officers' signature and Kentaro's consent, the boy was ready to be taken out of jail into a loving house as soon as possible.

The police reported alarmingly, that the boy's psychological state worsened by the day and they were concerned about his health. With the legal papers in hand, Akira stormed to the castle where he was guided upwards the tower cell together with the Police Officer.  
On his way to the cell, a doctor told him about frantic attacks from Ryutaro, possible epileptic seizures and insanity. When Akira had reached the room, he wasn't surprised about the seizures or insanity. The boy was going mad! People were standing outside his cell, loud talking, laughing, throwing food inside through the bars.... it was a horror circus. And Akira lost it. He shouted so loud that the crowd winced and emptied the room within moments with Police help.. Slowly, Ryutaro came into sight who lay on the ground shivering and covering his head with his arms.... all around him lay stacks of paper which he had been given. But they weren't empty, they were all filled with drawings of flowers and horses. Just horses. And always the same one.

A police officer opened the cell door and Akira was the only one who stepped inside. Slowly, he came closer and spoke in a calm voice to the boy: “Ryutaro, don't be afraid. It is over now, you will be safe. I will bring you to a quiet place where no one can harm you.” He stretched out his arm and for the first time, he touched the bony shoulder of the boy who winced in natural affect. Akira moved his hand to the boy's head and tenderly cared over his silky, dark hair. He did so a few times until the boy was calm. It took them a few more minutes until the boy trusted him enough to be taken into his arms and carried out of the cell. Insecure, the boy held onto Akira's jacket and turned his face against his breast when bright daylight hit their faces.  
The police hold the mob back until they were seated safe inside a carriage and made their way outside of town, to Kentaro's house.

End of Part 1


	2. Chapter 2

Kentaro and his wife were already at the door when Akira arrived with the carriage in front of their house. He lifted Ryutaro out of the carriage and carried him inside. Kentaro's wife gasped and the gymnasium teacher followed Akira and pointed out the room which they had prepared for the young boy to stay in. It was small but cozy, with a desk underneath a window to sit at.  
Akira lay the boy onto the bed who rolled himself together into a ball to protect himself. His face was always covered with his overlong hair and apart from wincing in the cell earlier, he had never said a word. They still believed that he was mute.  
Kentaro, who had remained at the door, observed the whole situation. How Akira sat on the bed and cared the boy over his hair to calm him down. They almost whispered to each other when Kentaro asked: “Did he talk yet?”  
“Not a word but I believe that he can. I am convinced that you will be able to teach him. He was able to write his name and....” Akira stopped to think about something, then he continued. “When we left the cell today, the floor was covered with his drawings but always with the same objects: Horses and flowers. You may give him pen and paper, we might be surprised.”  
Kentaro nodded and he stepped out of the door when his wife hurried inside with a bowl of soup and a spoon in her hand. She entered the room and settled it down onto the table. “Can he eat alone?”  
Akira looked up and shook his head. “Not with cutlery, only with his hands.” The wife looked back at them sympathetically. Slowly, Akira addressed Ryutaro by his name and pulled him up tenderly into a sitting position. The boy looked out underneath his fringes like a frightened rabbit, his eyes drifting to the three people in the room. 

“This, Ryutaro, are teacher Kentaro and his wife Eleonora. They are good people and they will look after you. You will stay here in this house as their guest.”  
That was when the boy turned his head to Akira, as if he understood him. The lawyer was astonished about Ryutaro's reaction and smiled back at him while he spoke with Kentaro: “Did you see that?” Kentaro nodded. “Seems like hope is not lost yet.”  
In reflex, Ryutaro hold onto Akira's arm as if he didn't want him to leave. The lawyer continued explaining: “I would have loved to take you to my house but my house is already full with children. But we will keep in contact, I will visit you and care for you nevertheless.”  
Ryutaro looked back at Akira without emotion who grabbed for the bowl of soup and started feeding the boy.

Half an hour later, Kentaro brought Akira to his carriage and they talked in hushed voices.  
“I will be back tomorrow Kenken, just to check how he's doing. I hope that he won't throw a fit. If so, call for the doctor immediately, I will pay for everything that is needed.”

“Thank you Akira.”

“No my friend,” he lay his hand onto Kentaro's arm, “Thank you. For your service on humanity. We will get the boy to a point where he can live and work independently. And I hope that he will be able to remember where he came from.”

“You are working on his case?”

“I am.” And with that Akira saluted from his carriage and the said their goodbyes.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

When Akira arrived the next day, he stopped surprised in front of Ryutaro, who had his hair shoulder length and his fringes cut but only the half of it. One half was still covering his eyes, the other one showed one of his beautiful brown eyes. A slight smiled hushed over his lips when Akira entered the house but he still didn't say a word and made no motion. He stood and sat everywhere where people positioned him to.

Kentaro scratched his head. “Well, we tried to cut his hair but he moved all the time. He was afraid of the scissors and when we wanted to cut his bangs, he freaked out. Thus this haircut.”

Akira smiled amused. “Leave it, it suits him well. And from a psychological point of view: He can partly see and partly hide. Living is easier for him that way.”

Kenken nodded and added: “We also practiced walking with him and we will do so every day. He is still very wobbly on his feet but we will get there.” Akira nodded sunken in thoughts when he looked back at Ryutaro who sat on the couch of the living room motionless. He was clad in a white button down shirt and black trousers, a black vest made the outfit perfect. He was quite lovely, all groomed and washed. His insecure demeanor and otherworldly being gave him credit, made him stand out between people and his surroundings. 

Akira didn't follow Kenken at this point and wondered who in the world would give up such a petite human being. 

“Akira?”

“I am sorry Kenken, I was just thinking about what to do next. I will go to the archives again tomorrow and search the baptism documents for a boy in his age.”

“He hardly looks 16.”

“I know. But I guess with regular food and education, he will become a fine young man.” Akira clapped Kenken's shoulder. “When will you start teaching him writing and speaking?”

“Tomorrow. And if it's just a little bit but I will teach him every day.” Kenken paused. “We like that boy and I want to study on his case how long it takes for a person to become a modest citizen.”

“Very well.... but tell me, how was the first night?”

“It was okay. We didn't get much sleep but not because of the boy throwing fits or walking around the house at night. He slept unusually calm. It was us who stayed awake to check on him regularly.”

Akira smiled. “It's you and your lovely wife, the peaceful house and the garden outside. All this together makes the boy get calm... God knows what kind of life he had before that...”

“Any ideas apart from the fact that he was locked away?”

Akira shook his head. “Locked away in darkness, he is sensitive to daylight. And the more I think about it, the more I suspect that he lived in a cell so small which made it impossible for him to stand up straight. Otherwise he would be able to walk.”

Kentaro shook his head in disbelieve..... “What kind of monsters.”

“And that's what I will find out.”

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Ryutaro was a very sensitive boy. He jolted by the slightest noise and as soon as somebody came walking around the corner, he already looked at the person which made him a somewhat spooky fellow sometimes. But he was of tender nature. When Kenken wasn't teaching him, he was indeed drawing flowers and horses. Observing that, Kenken took the boy outside into his garden and Taro started drawing from living objects, he lost himself in doing so to the finest detail.

It all started out better than anticipated, until the reporters arrived in front of their home. Obviously, the town didn't forget about the lost boy who used to be locked away in the castle tower and somebody must have sniffed out where they had brought him.  
They kept Taro inside the house and Kenken did everything he could to get rid of the noisy reporters. But they returned regularly and he had no other option but to call for Akira's help. With a verdict from the police and a few harsh words and threats, it took them over a month to bring silence again into the neighborhood.

But Kentaro kept on teaching Ryutaro after lunch after he returned from teaching at the local school. It took Taro 4 months to learn the alphabet and Kenken couldn't help himself but to notice the fine hand of Taro. Sure, he was used to draw flowers in petite detail and his letters weren't any different. Turned out that Taro was a sensible artist, a fine soul and with his hands and body in porcelain white, Kentaro started to suspect something. No matter where this boy came from, this body and soul wasn't born in a peasant household. He seemed almost noble in the way he carried himself and fulfilled his tasks.  
Him speaking was another matter though. Kenken had started with names and objects first and after repeating them a few times, Taro's voice turned out to be as tender as his appearance, not too high and not too low. He had difficulties forming sentences though, it was really like teaching a baby.

Akira smiled, when he entered one day and Taro said his name out loud. He took the boys hand and shook it to greet him. They all did their best in teaching him to become a normal citizen.

“Taro!” They used to call him by his shorter nickname, “I am so glad that you are well.” Akira lifted his hand to the boy's head and patted him before he looked back at Kentaro. “How is he doing?”

“He is a quick learner, one of my best students so far.” Ryutaro smiled and it confirmed what they suspected all along: Although he didn't say much, he understood the majority of it. 

Akira addressed Taro to practice his speaking: “How are you feeling today?”

A smile went over Taro's face and he answered as steady as he could: “Very well, thank you.”

“That's good to hear.” Akira pulled back his hand. “If you will excuse me Taro, I need to speak to Kentaro.”

“Of course.” The boy answered and he went into his room to get his pen and paper to occupy himself with his favorite hobby.

Akira was happy about the progress and followed Kenken into his study. He closed the door behind them and Akira took a seat. Kenken seemed rather thoughtful today and addressed it right away: “How did your research go?”

Akira breathed in deeply. “Not so well, I haven't found any entry in the church's books about a boy with Taro's name. This can only mean that he was born in another town and brought here or his name is false, probably both. This is like searching a needle in a haystack. He could be from everywhere...”

“Maybe not from everywhere...”

“What do you mean?”

“I had a chance to observe the boy over this past few weeks and I am absolutely sure that he was not born into a poor family like your letters said. He is a fine soul, artistic, intelligent, a quick learner, even his limbs are of perfect porcelain....”

“What are you implying at?” Akira said although he had an inkling what Kentaro meant.

“I think that you have to go up higher in your research, much higher.”

“Royal.” Akira said and the word hung like a secret in between them inside this little room. Kentaro nodded. “This would explain everything.” Akira stood up and he walked around the little room thinking deeply and murmuring his thoughts out loud. “That's preposterous... let's say he is royal, why would someone keep a boy captive instead of killing him right off? Because he is valuable to someone... after 16 years, when he is able to life by himself, they want to get rid of him with fake letters thus they drive him to the next bigger town, which was Nuremberg.... Dear Lord.” Akira halted. It all made sense. In an absurd way, it all made sense.

“Which house do you think he could have been born in?”

Akira sat down in front of Kentaro's desk again. “There are three Royal families in southern Germany. The king of Baden, king of Württemberg and the kingdom of Bavaria, which would mean the families of interest here are the king of Bavaria, the houses of Stuttgart and Hohenzollern and the king of Baden.”

A moment of silence before Kentaro added: “This is madness, you know that.”

“I know.”

“This could be the work of a lifetime, not to mention the danger you can bring upon yourself..... and the boy.”

“I will be careful. This boy will never be at rest until he knows the truth.”

“You are right about that. Now and then I caught him at night, sitting on his bed and looking outside the window at the moon, as if he is thinking about something, maybe trying to remember something but I never asked him because right now I don't think that he has the capacity of words to describe it.”

“Let us give him time. I am sure that he will open up when he's ready.”

Kentaro nodded. “So, I presume that you are trying to get access to the baptism books of the church the royal families are attending?”

Akira smiled and stood up. “There is much to do.”

“I guess you can say that.” And Kentaro grabbed his math book for children and left his study together with Akira.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Out of Ryutaro's view

I can not think in words and phrases but in colors and feelings. Everything is strange to me: The people, the world, the spoken word... From people's faces and noises I picture together what they could mean, from the energy they give off I know whom I can approach and whom to avoid.  
Bright sunlight hurts my eyes but at night I can see well like a cat. Loud noises do scare me immensely and I recognize people by their odors before I see them.  
Everything is new to me and I am surprised that people address me like a grown man although I feel like a child. I learn like a child but I have the body of a young man. Sometimes I try to communicate with people but I feel ashamed when I don't know the words and start to stutter... thus I prefer to keep quiet.  
Because everything is new to me, I am thirsty for knowledge. I love listening to Kentaro's voice when he explains the outside world to me, I love feeling the wind playing with my hair, I love seeing the bees dancing from flower to flower.... it's all a miracle for me. I try to absorb everything, picture everything inside my mind and try to copy it on paper, I am crazy for everything new and beautiful.  
I do not understand why most people have such grim faces and unfriendly voices. No one seems to have harmed them and they are free people. No one of them had to life in a dark room for 16 years, they always had food to eat... it's strange to me. The people, the world, I do not understand it. My body, my existence, I do not understand it.... where I come from? Who gave me my name? I do not know. No one ever spoke to me before I came here, I was fed in darkness by somebody I never saw.

I have no feelings, no knowledge about this time but I am curious. Curious for everything new.

End of Part 2


	3. Chapter 3

It was half a year later when Akira took the boy for the first time back into town. He and Kentaro talked about it long enough and they agreed that it was a good sign that Ryutaro wasn't jolting by the slightest noise any longer.   
Akira on the other hand was nervous. He knew that this day would come because Taro at some point had to get used to people, not to mention communicate with them. Taro answered them as best as he could but deeper meaning conversations were still out of the question. The boy was however clever enough t ask questions like 'where did I come from?' A question which no one of them could answer.... yet. The boy couldn't remember anything. All he recalled was that he was hold in a dark tiny room and that no one spoke to him. An unknown person shoved food into his cell every day and his only trinket back then was a little wooden horse on wheels which he had lost during his hasty release. Akira believed that it was a deep rooted trauma which made Taro forget everything about his past.  
The day he was released, a man came for him but he couldn't see him. They covered his face with a sack and the next thing he knew was that he was standing on grass and the man tried to teach him how to walk in moving Taro's feet from behind with his own. It was in vain and took him several hours. After that, he was released in the town of Nuremberg with the letters in his hands and that was it.  
It made Akira furious and he had asked Taro many times whether he recalled anything else but Taro really couldn't remember. What they were certain of was, that Taro had nightmares and who could blame him. Majority of his dreams were about getting chased and locked away but he never knew by whom.  
Akira's efforts to get his hands onto the baptism books of the southern Germany Royals, proved to be more difficult than anticipated. All churches declined access because it was only allowed with a special warrant from the police. And God knew he was working on that.

Over time, it had become a beautiful ritual for Ryutaro to hold every person's hand when he was guided or taken somewhere, just like a child. But now and then they caught him giving unsuspected witty answers or asking interesting questions. He was a curious little fellow. 

Akira and Taro approached the town from a lovely little side street which was almost too narrow for a cart to pass through. The half-timber houses looked tipsy and stood tight together, the cobble stone made it hard for Ryutaro to walk. Akira gave him time to get used to it and held his arm tight to make sure that he didn't fell.  
“Where are we going?” Taro looked up from underneath his black top hat. They had dressed him up nicely with a black frock coat and brown woolen trousers.  
“Into town, I want you to get used to people Taro. Because one day, you will have to work and earn your own money.” They had these conversations a dozen times before but the principle was still hard for Ryutaro to understand. “If you see something you don't understand, you can ask me okay?” Taro nodded. Within this moment, a door was loudly shut and the young man jumped. Akira patted his shoulder with his free hand and murmured that everything was okay, that it was just a door.   
Over time, Akira had observed that Taro hardly moved his body. He walked slowly and his gestures when talking or smiling were non existing. It was the same now in town. Although he was very curious he hardly moved his head, only his eyes wandered around. Taro behaved like a living doll, as if he didn't want to pull any attention to himself.  
Akira showed him how to greet people by tipping the brim of his hat. It took him several attempts before he had the heart to do so. Tiny steps but they would eventually get there.

They passed a little fountain in between the housing area and children were playing with water. Their laughter filled the streets and it was a beautiful sight to see. Taro first widened his eyes before the hint of a smile came over his lip. There was something about this pure joy which filled people's hearts and especially Taro's. He was very emphatic. Akira halted and they observed the scenery together before continuing on their way. “They are about the same age as my boy and girl..” Taro looked up at Akira. “You do have children?”  
“Yes, two and the third is soon to be born.” They didn't go into detail about that matter yet. Thankfully Taro didn't ask any further.   
The closer they got to the market place, the more people surrounded them. Akira could feel how Taro tried to get closer to him, his hands stiff in agitation but he didn't say a word. He made his way in uneasy steps and tried to hide behind his half cut bangs and top hat. Akira became so good in reading him that he seriously considered to turn around and call it a day. That was before people started noticing them and started to whisper. Akira halted and so did Taro. A loud voice among the crowd shouted: “That's the boy!” And that was it. People turned around, some even walked towards them to have a look and soon they were surrounded. Akira encircled Taro's shoulder with one arm while people were building up around them and it got louder. Taro started breathing out loud in panic, his grip on Akira's arm was almost painful. He ignored the annoying questions and looked around in panic.... that was when the market place's police noticed the bulk of people and they whistled out loud to break the circle.....

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Kentaro opened his door before the carriage came to a halt in front of his house. The horses were exhausted and by the look of his old friend, he could tell that something went wrong. His fears were confirmed when he saw Akira lifting the boy out of the carriage and carrying him inside the house. Taro hold onto Akira's neck like a child which in some way he still was.

Akira put the boy into his bed and closed the door carefully.

“What happened?” Kentaro asked. Akira walked together with him into his study. 

“We were recognized, can you believe it? Even after half a year people still recognize him!”

Kenken shook his head. “The boy who became famous over night.... well that's a problem. What can we possibly do?”

Akira slumped down into his seat and covered his eyes with one hand. “You tell me. I thought it was a good idea to get Taro used to the city and its strange humans in general....” Akira paused and thought about something. “You know that I had planned to get him into my smaller attorney's office in Ansbach as a clerk because his handwriting is so beautiful...”

“I know I know.”

“And I do believe that it is possible. It just takes some time.”

Kenken looked back at Akira. “I do think that it is possible but with all due respect old friend, the press is knocking on both our doors because you are researching the case and people are talking.”

It became even worse. The next day Akira could hardly reach his smaller office outside of Nuremberg, in a small town called Ansbach because it was blocked by people from newspapers and the mob. They were shouting questions about the lost boy's case and where he lived and what his real name was.... but one question in particular caught his attention: “Is it true that he is noble?”  
Akira turned around with a glare that could kill and people moved back slightly before the lawyer pulled the big wooden door loudly shut. Furiously, he stomped his way up into the office and opened the first door to a writing room where several employees were copying documents and writing letters. “WHO TOLD THE PRESS THAT THE BOY IS NOBLE, WHO?!”  
The clerks were taken aback and looked shocked at the cities most infamous lawyer. None of them dared to say a word and Akira continued his way through all the offices until everybody felt guilty for possibly talking about something they had no right to. The last office door opened on its own and the major stepped outside to see what the ruckus was all about.

“Mr. Nakayama! What on earth made you loose your mind?!”

Akira stomped into his office uninvited and the major closed the door behind them.  
“Tell me Mr. Major, just yesterday I fled the city of Nuremberg with a traumatized boy in my arms and today the press and mob here in Ansbach is greeting me on this very door with assumptions that the boy could be noble?! Who in his limited mind is TALKING outside these walls about a case which is even to us still unknown?! These assumptions are dangerous!”

“Well maybe people realized that you Mr. Nakayama, were running around and asking for insight into royal baptism books of the biggest churches on South German terrain? People have eyes, ears and mouths and there is nothing that could stop them from talking. Only a bigger scandal can help you now. Against these voices, we are all powerless.”

Akira balled his fists and bit his teeth together. He knew that the Major was right and the realization that even his actions were partly to blame... made him unbelievably furious. Without another word spoken, he went back into his office and closed the door loudly shut.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

A most joyous message was received by Akira one week later when a lawyer friend from Frankfurt had made it possible with mostly legal measures to guarantee him insight in the long anticipated church baptism books from south Germany. He had to travel to four churches in Southern Germany which were the family churches for the royal houses there.   
Akira intended to start with the biggest church in Munich, followed by Stuttgart, he had already checked Nuremberg where he had found nothing, followed by a little provincial city called Pforzheim and another royal house in Karlsruhe where the King of Baden resided. As they suspected that Taro had been born in the South, these were the possible houses.  
The effort to research the city archive's church books in each town were enormous. Akira braced himself for many sleepless nights because his time was limited. He could hardly take one week off of work and for this research, he had managed with his attorney's office to take off three unpaid weeks, hopefully to find something about the unknown boy.  
After his return, he had planned to take Taro with himself into his office in Ansbach, despite all the rumors and people talking. The boy had to get used to a stable job and his fame would hardly vanish over night so he better got used to it. He had a talk with Kentaro about it and after a while, he agreed although not happily.

Akira's search warrant didn't go unnoticed. At the same time, a certain royal house was informed that the persistent lawyer from Nuremberg had finally access to the baptism books. But Akira should never know of that. 

In teacher Kentaro's house, it was unusually quiet. It felt more like the silence before the storm. Taro had three beautiful late summer weeks at Kenken's house and the daily teachings in history, German language and Mathematics were bearable. In his free time, he did what he loved most and that was drawing. Human interaction was another thing that took a lot of his energy. Taro tried not to be a burden to the friendly couple and he excused himself for almost every little thing, which was not necessary but he felt like he had to.   
Despite his calm and silent facade, in his head it was never quiet, especially at night. The more he became aware of human life and himself, fundamental questions rose to the surface. Who am I? Where did I come from? Why am I here? Why did these strange people give me away? Am I a bad person? Am I different? Why am I different?  
Taro didn't ask Kentaro nor Akira these questions because he was aware that they couldn't answer them as well but he knew that Akira did everything in his power to find out about his past. Why he did that though and with so much passion, Taro didn't understand. He was very thankful to all of them for their enormous help though and he said 'thank you' as much as possible.  
He also kept his little bedroom particularly tidy and at the end of the day he hung his clothing up sorted by color. It were these daily rituals that kept him sane, which made this imperfect world and uncontrollable thoughts a little more bearable.   
His drawings were exquisite and full of detail because he had a photographic memory, the tiniest changes in the house never went unnoticed. Taro was also sensitive to noise and sunlight, most likely a result because of his childhood spent in captivity and darkness. When the nightmares were too bad, he sometimes stayed awake all night but never remembered what they were about. All he knew was that he usually got chased from somebody.   
In his daily life, Taro was unusually slow, Kenken trained him to get into routines faster, to move faster and to talk more freely. It was a strain but they eventually got there. Touch was another thing he was very sensitive about. Casual touches on the shoulder made him wince and it took some time until Kentaro's wife could comb Taro's hair in the morning to show him how to groom himself neatly. But he always kept his strange haircut, he loved it. It gave him security in a world that was full of possible dangers.

It was Kentaro who told Taro that after Akira's return, he would start as a writer in the attorney's office in Ansbach. It gave him a few sleepless nights to say the least but he was glad that Akira would be there. He had no urge to 'make some friends' like Kenken said but if they insisted that it was the best for him, all he could do was try.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Akira was in his second week of research and he was done with Munich and Stuttgart which were even more straining than anticipated. He could have used the help of one or two more people but since the topic was quite confidential, he had to do everything on his own. Munich was the biggest task as hundreds of people are born and baptized every month. So he had no luck there and no luck in Stuttgart either. No signs of a boy with Taro's name and age and the fact that the birth-date was maybe false in these letters didn't help him either.   
Right now he was on his way to Pforzheim and after that to the archives in Karlsruhe, residence of the royal houses of Baden. He had one week of research left and hoped to find something, only a tiny thing in one of these churches or archives. The fact that the authorities who guarded the archives were quite unfriendly didn't bother him at all. As a lawyer and president of the high court he was used to not being on the top of the guest lists.

Inside the carriage which brought Akira to the city of Pforzheim, he took notes of his research and made possible assumptions.   
If no one missed the boy and left him in a strange town for good, people wanted to get rid of him. It was possible that with a false name or if it was his real name and it was nowhere to be found in any books, they maybe wanted the boy dead. But because they didn't kill him in the first place and locked him away instead could possibly mean that he was dear to someone or of some worth. These assumptions made him check next to the baptism books the books of death as well. Just in case someone wanted to declare a boy with his name or his birth month and year dead.  
Akira couldn't help himself but feel that his intuition was not completely wrong here.

After arriving in the little old town of Pforzheim, Akira was greeted with a closed church of the house of Baden. He made his way to the majors office and their reservations against him were even more obvious that the ones in Munich. He even had to threaten them with his official search warrant until they opened their archives for him to research. On top of it, he had been watched all day and night by a security person of the office. That he felt strange and observed was an understatement. Usually, lawyer colleagues used to help each other out with their cases if someone was in need of help but their behavior was close to hostile.   
It was a day later when Akira finally started his research in the death books of the local church. Earlier on he found out that the palace of the King of Baden buried their deaths in this little church of Pforzheim, although they had more splendid churches in their hometown of Karlsuhe where their residence was. Seemed like it was a family tradition, started from a King in their family a few hundred years ago and they kept it that way.  
The heir to the throne who resided in the residence of Karlsruhe nowadays was Karl Ludwig Friedrich from Baden and his wife Stephanie Louise Adrienne de Beauhannais.... apparently an adopted daughter from none other than Napoleon Bonaparte himself.   
Akira took his notes silently and kept on studying their family tree. He checked on all royal births that were noted on the family tree and cross checked at the same time in the baptism books. The entries were correct. They had five children, three daughters and two boys. The girls were still alive but both of the boys died shortly after their birth. One boy, Alexander died after one year and one boy was stillborn without a name. Apparently. 

Akira paused and settled his pen down. Even the year of the stillborn's death was identical with Taro's year of birth in the letter. Was it a coincidence? He breathed in and out deeply and tried to collect his thoughts. These were just speculations and dangerous ones as well, but he couldn't help himself but to feel that he was close onto something.  
He was still observed by one of the office workers and had to pretend that everything was okay and nothing out of the ordinary. Akira was very aware of the position he was in and any assumption that came to light could cost him dearly. Any information could turn into false rumors and his career could be over. So with sweaty hands, Akira took his notes pokerfaced. After he was done copying the information of the royal family tree and its birth and death dates, he put the books back. His next stop was the church in Pforzheim where the two dead boys must be buried.   
Like on the first day, the church was closed. After asking about it, it turned out that the church was only opened once a week during mass on Sunday. It was Friday and Akira decided to prolong his stay in town to 'visit the mass'. They can't ban him from visiting mass.   
What he did two days later was pay no attention at all to what the protestant priest was preaching in front of them. Akira looked around the church and tried to memorize every detail of it. He had hoped so see some stone sarcophagus with badges of the royal family in the back of the church like some churches did but it turned out that they were down in the crypt, buried in the ground. Some badges were engraved on the floor though at the back of the church which meant that the sarcophagus' were buried underneath them. And there was no way on God's earth to get to them, pray even open them for examination.

If Akira's very wild assumptions were true, then the sarcophagus of the stillborn boy was empty and the boy very alive in his old friend's home. Just imagine that.  
The thought of it was scandalous and could even cost his head. Akira didn't even write it down into his notebook. He made his way to Karlsruhe nevertheless and decided to visit the art gallery there. If the books were lying about the boy's death, Genes couldn't. Akira decided to look at the royal portraits in the art gallery. At least all royal families were vain enough to portray their faces for the people to see.  
It took Akira half a day with the carriage to reach the old town of Karlsruhe. It was a bustling town and far more elegant than Nuremberg. This was a town of international trade, especially with France because of its closeness to the border and people were more fashionable here too. Nuremberg was more of rural descent. The art gallery was similar breathtaking and it didn't take Akira long to find the royal portraits in this collection. The royal family of Baden: Prince and Princess with their three living daughters. There were no portraits of the boys of course because of their early deaths. 

But when Akira looked at the portrait of Princess Stephanie Louise Adrienne de Beauhannais, he stopped breathing. He looked into beautiful brown eyes.... which were absolutely familiar to him.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

When Akira stepped out of the carriage two days later and looked back at his old friend Kentaro, who had waited for him at the door, he knew that Akira must have found something. His gaze was heavy and his shoulder rigid. Their welcoming words were cold to say the least and Akira did his best in keeping up a facade, especially in front of Kentaro's wife and Taro.   
Akira smiled for the first time after weeks of hard work when Taro hugged him firmly to welcome him back. He knew how shy Taro was and patted his head lovingly. “It's so good to see you well Taro, really good.” He smiled at the boy who bowed slightly and stepped back when he felt that Kentaro guided Akira into his study for a private word.  
After Kentaro had closed the door, he asked with anticipation: “What have you found out?”

Akira took a seat after it had been offered and thought a moment about it before he spoke: “There is something but only assumptions. I thought long about it whether to tell anybody and decided that I won't.”

Kentaro looked taken aback. “What?! Why?!”

“To save any of us and our families. What I can say is that its only assumptions. There is no proof on paper whatsoever. Even if our assumptions, that Taro is from a royal house were true, the documents and papers of the royal houses are legally right, or at least have been 'corrected' to be right..... anyway, there is nothing to prove. Only our assumptions....”

Kentaro nodded. “I respect your decision.”

Akira remained silent before he continued. “I won't tell you which house I possibly suspect, I didn't even write it down. So, my friend, if anybody should ever threaten or blackmail you, there is nothing you can tell or know. I have nothing on paper too.”

At that, Kentaro remained very still. Hearing these words from his old friend who was usually afraid of nothing, silenced him as well. Whatever he may have possibly found out must have been grave.

“And I decided to tell Taro that I couldn't find anything about his possible family, to save the boy. His early life was tragic enough. He deserves a normal life and it's better that way, believe me. Moreover, I believe that I have been watched during my research, the welcoming in the archives was very frosty too, to say the least.”

“Dear Lord.” Was all Kentaro could say. “Are you still planning to take the boy with you to work anyway?”

“Yes. Now even more than ever. I will take him with me on Monday and return him to you in the evening until he is stable enough to come and leave work without me. Maybe even life in Ansbach on his own. The boy has to get used to a normal life.”

Kentaro nodded and Akira added: “You are a good person my old friend, may God watch over you and your family.”

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Akira's one month absence was heavily questioned by the staff of the supreme court in Nuremberg and even the major, whom he played down by telling that he couldn't find anything. Tu pull himself and Taro out of the spotlight, he returned to his old attorney's office in the smaller town of Ansbach and the curiosity there was overshadowed by the petite man he had brought with himself.   
Taro hold onto Akira's arm and all he could do was nod politely while Akira made his way through the office with the bundle of nerves on his arm and introducing him to everybody.

“Ladies,” Akira entered the female writing room, he literally had to drag Taro inside behind him, “this is Ryutaro Arimura, my protege and my copyist from today on. Please treat him with the same respect you treat me. This is his first work so please be patient with him and help him if he has any questions.” Taro bowed to the group of women who were smiling and giggling. The pressure of being looked at was almost unbearable and he was thankful when they had finished their greeting tour. Some men were friendly to them and some not so much.   
As president of the high court, Akira could hire whomever he wanted and Taro got a little writing room right next to his office. A door joined their two rooms which Akira felt was necessary to give Taro security for his new life here. His old secretary had to move a few rooms further down the corridor because of that. As discussed, it was Taro's task to copy documents because of his beautiful handwriting. It was a job perfectly fit for his temper.  
Akira had just settled Taro down on his working desk and started to explain his working utensils, when the major himself came inside the office. Taro stood up immediately and looked down at his feet shyly. They shook arms and the major looked at him smiling.

“He's a nice young boy Akira, you looked after him very well.”

“It's all thanks to teacher Kentaro, he deserves the praise.”

“Well well,” the major looked back at Taro, “I am glad to see you looking well Ryutaro. Have a good start here and do your best.”

Ryutaro nodded and thanked the major who looked back at Akira. “Mr. Nakayama, a word. In my office please.”

“Of course.” Akira gestured Taro to take his seat. “I will be back soon, please wait here for me.”

And with that the two grown men were gone. The major closed the door to his office behind them and gestured Akira to sit. 

“Mr. Nakayama, I cannot believe that you haven't found anything in your month long research about the boy.... he looks phenomenal. With all the dirt and scruff gone, he is a fine young man. He will make it in society eventually.”

Akira listened to all that nonsense and reminded himself that it was better not to tell the major where he can put his words into.

“He is of a fine nature indeed. He will be good in the position of a writer and copyist.” Akira tried to change the topic but with no avail.

“I cannot help myself but to think that the rumors about his noble self could be true....”

Akira's gaze sharpened and he addressed the major. “With all due respect Mr. Major, any accusation of that nature can be very dangerous to the boy. There is no legal evidence, no documents of that sort and I considered all possibilities. The boy had a tough start into life, we should help him to life a normal life.”   
The major held one hand in front of his mouth and nodded. “Very well, you are quite right Mr. Nakayama.” And with that, the conversation was over.

After Akira had returned to his office, he heard voices of a group of chatting women coming from Ryutaro's very new office. Akira literally stormed it and halted when he saw the girls smiling and talking to Ryutaro. To his astonishment, the young boy nodded and smiled along but he didn't really engage in the small talk though. Maybe this change in life was good after all. Akira smiled before he clapped his hands twice and the Ladies jolted. They excused themselves and left the two men alone.   
He couldn't help himself but to think that a flower which blooms in adversity, is the rarest and most beautiful of all.

“I am sorry Akira.” Taro stammered.

“There is nothing to be sorry for. It's good to make new acquaintances. Listen to my advise Ryutaro: It is good to meet new people but don't talk of private matters or of matters outside of work, listen and ask questions if you want to but don't become too close or too private with people.” Akira took a chair and sat down next to Taro on his desk. “Not all people are friendly and nice, not even the people who are smiling at you. Be careful and observe people, listen to what they say, how they say it and how they act. After that you can decide whether to be acquainted with them or not. It's about feeling. If you have a good feeling about a person, listen to that feeling. If you have a not so good feeling about a person, try to avoid that person. Understood?”

Taro nodded and Akira went back to his desk in his office to get the first documents for Taro to copy.

End of Part 3


	4. Chapter 4

The following days, Akira was very conscious about people approaching Ryutaro and the whispering voices on the corridor. He tolerated it for three days but on the fourth day he called in all members of the attorney's office and Ryutaro and addressed the rumors which had been whispered behind closed doors. 

In clear words he said that after his long and tedious research, he came to the conclusion that Ryutaro was not of noble birth how some people claimed him to be and he forbid any conversation about his protege's private life out of respect to the boy and his hard work. Any violation would be punished with immediate resignation.  
The following work days were beautifully quiet and Akira felt that Taro was more relaxed then at the beginning too. He always wondered how much of the gossip he really heard and understood but he couldn't tell since Taro had never mentioned any of it.   
The boy was quite sad when Akira had told him after his research that he hadn't found anything about his parents. He took it silently and went on with his life since he couldn't help it anyway. His new work was a welcome distraction. In fact, Taro did very well in copying the documents and it was like Akira had expected: The boy dove into his new task with remarkable concentration and devotion. In utter silence, he finished all his work.  
Although Akira had convinced all of the people that he had found nothing during his research, now and then his thoughts drifted off to the fatal discovery he had made. Even when he had no written evidence, Akira was convinced that his assumptions were true. The Princess of Baden and Taro shared almost the same face, the petite build and hair color. To be precise, it was only a matter of time until one person recognized Taro's face in the face of the Princess and this was dangerous and their time was running out. It became more and more obvious that to save the boy, they had to evacuate him, maybe up north where no one knew Taro or even abroad..... he was such a lovely boy and Akira wondered which father would fake the death of his own first born son.  
And Akira stopped writing. There was only one reason why a father would do that.... When the child was not his own child! He must have been fathered by another man! This was the only explanation that made sense and because a mother can't life with the shame of a born child being killed, she gave it away.  
Holy Lord.... Akira looked up and jolted in his seat. Taro stood silently in front of his desk because he was finished with his work again.

“Taro!” Akira gasped. “You startled me.”

“I am sorry.”

“It's okay to make some noise when you are walking, you don't have to act in utter silence.” But the boy's gaze stuck on the large wall of books behind Akira's desk.

“Did you read all of these?”

“Not all but most of them.”

“Did it take a long time? And do you remember all of it?”

Akira smiled. “Yes, it took a long time and no, I cannot remember all of it. No person can remember all of it but it is wise to know where you can find information if you need it.”

There was a knock on the door and by the haste of it, Akira could tell who it was.

“Please enter Susanne!”

A young girl of nineteen years with strawberry blonde hair and freckles entered the lawyer's office and halted when she saw Taro standing in between Akira's desk and the door. “Hello Mr. Nakayama, Ryutaro.” She was literally glowing and smiling from within. Akira realized it, Ryutaro didn't. The young boy nodded at the girl, looked at her and Akira and left the room awkwardly without another word spoken to leave them in their confidence.

“Susanne?” Akira asked to direct her attention back to himself. “What's the matter?”

“Oh!” She stepped forward and handed him a map of documents from her colleague. “The documents you have been asking for.” She paused.

“Thank you.” Akira dismissed her with a sharp tone and she left the office with a nod. Akira slumped back in his chair and breathed out loud. Now he felt like the father whose daughter got courted but in this case it was his son. Perfect.

As a matter of fact, Ryutaro was quite popular with the girls but the boy didn't understand any of it. He was happy about the attention, much to the dismay of some men in the office but Akira was sure that it was because Taro was new and the excitement would pass. But until then, he had to dismiss one or two ladies which tried to stay too long. He was really the father of the bride here.

It was one day at the office when Ryutaro made his way to the bathroom and halted on the corridor when he heard voices coming from inside.

“I bet he was the one who started the rumors of being noble to get all the girls.”

“Yeah, I thought the same. I mean look at him, which girl would be interested-”

Taro jolted when he felt someone touching him on his elbow and he hurled around. It was the girl Susanne and she tagged him along the other way and outside to the courtyard to breath in some fresh air.

“Don't listen to what these men say. They are just jealous.” She said.

Taro looked at her from behind his half cut bangs. “What is jealous?”

Susanne bit her lips, turned her head from left to right and thought about it. “Well, that's a good question. I never had to explain it before. Okay jealousy means that you want to have something another person has and this unpleasant feeling you feel is jealousy.”

“I see. Thank you, you explained it well.” 

“My pleasure.” She smiled at him but rather than being dazzled by it, Taro wondered why she behaved that way. It was different from how Akira and Kentaro treated him. Another thing Taro didn't knew was the fact, that she would have loved to spend time with him outside of work but since it was a men's world and Taro as a man had to be the one to make the first move... which would N.E.V.E.R happen as Taro didn't understand most of societies etiquette yet.  
It amused the young girl how Taro stood there motionless like a doll and only addressed her when spoken to. There was something alien about him which was most alluring and the fact that he wasn't aware of it made him only more special. No woman liked a vain man.

“I think I better go back to my place.” Taro said and she nodded and followed him inside the office again.

Taro entered his office again and sat down noiseless. Akira had dropped some documents on his desk before he had left for an appointment outside and his writing material on his desk was all over the place. Taro took the documents and sorted them in size and length of the texts. Then he rearranged his writing material in size and color, only then he was able to continue with his work.

It was that night when another blow shook the peaceful world of him.  
The rest of the day went by uneventfully and Taro went to bed in the evening. Around 2 am, he opened his eyes as he had heard something in his room and he froze in shock. His room was illuminated by the moon light which shone through the large window... and a clear black shadow of a man holding something emerged from the white wall in front of him. Taro gasped for air, this was his nightmare come alive and when he had finally inhaled as much air as possible, he started to scream for his dear life.

Kenken and his wife woke up startled. In no time, Kenken grabbed for the pistol underneath his bed, gestured his wife to stay in bed and ran along the corridor to the back where Ryutaro's room was. When Kenken entered, he saw that the large window was open and the wind played with the curtains. Taro sat in the corner of his bed, his blanket pulled up to his eyes and he was crying.   
Kenken stepped forward and closed the window immediately. He pulled the dark curtains shut and sat down onto Ryutaro's bed.

“Taro, it's me.”

The young boy lunged forward and hold onto Kenken in desperation. His whole body was trembling and his pajama stuck to his back because of all the sweat. The older man cared over Taro's back, his hair and rocked him like a child. With tender words he calmed him down. His wife entered as well with some milk to drink and settled it down onto Taro's little table. They stayed inside Taro's room until the sun went up.

A few hours later, when Akira arrived to take Taro with him to work, he knew that something must have happened when Kenken stood at the front of his house. Worried, Akira hurried to his old friend who guided him inside his study.

“What's the matter Kentaro? Where is Ryutaro?”

“He's asleep. We had a horrible night.”

“What happened?”

“A stranger gained access to Ryutaro's room around 2 am last night.”

“Good Lord! What happened?! Is he all right?!”

“He's well under the circumstances. The stranger came in through the window and as soon as Taro screamed for his life, the man had vanished.”

“Are you sure there was an actual man inside his room?”

“The window was wide open when I found Taro crying in his bed. He never sleeps with open windows because he is easily scared.”

Akira breathed out loudly. “This is bad. This is really bad.” A lot went through his mind. Not only was his boy under shock and in a state of new added fear but him being the target of a possible assault.... confirmed that he was maybe on the right path in his research. “This is my fault. I endangered Taro through my research. I need to protect him.”

“What do you have in mind?”

“I need to relocate the boy to a city far away. He cannot stay here.”

Kentaro nodded. “I agree.”

“And we mustn't say a word to the police. A scandal is the last thing we need right now.” Akira stood up because he had to go to work. “I will return in the evening and look after Taro.”

“Eleonora will stay with Taro the whole day, I too will return after work as quickly as possible.”

Akira lay his hand on Kentaro's shoulder before leaving the house in a rush.  
The first thing Akira did was writing a letter to an old friend from his time at university whom was working in an attorney's office in Hamburg, over 600 kilometers up north. They needed to evacuate the boy soon and since Akira himself was planning to work for another attorney's office next year, he and his family would move out of sight as well.   
Akira hoped that everything would turn out well. They just tried to life a normal life. No claims had been made on behalf of Taro, so no one should want anything from them, right?

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Akira had visited Taro at Kenkens home the same night and hold him in his arms for a long time before Taro's breathing became even again.   
They decided to continue with work the following day, to show strength and to keep their daily life going. Besides, Akira felt safer to have Taro under his watch during the day rather than letting him stay at home with Kentaro's wife. It was safer for all of them and no sane man would try to break into an attorney's office. The negative side effect however was, that Taro was even more frightened... if that was even possible. He jolted by the slightest noise and Akira tried to give him confidence in talking good and calm to him. He also told Taro that he was a fighter. His life had been hard but he made it out of it. Now he was a fine young man with a job in a highly respected office. Taro, for the first time, felt very proud of himself when Akira had praised him.

It was three days later when a knock sounded at Akira's door. Taro jolted but kept on writing the sentence which he had started. The lawyer was away on business and Taro's door which lead to Akira's office was open. Taro sat with his back to the door and just answered loudly to come in. He knew that it was Susanne because after weeks of working in the office, even Taro realized that the girl timed her 'visits' perfectly when Akira was gone, although he didn't really understand why.

“Susanne, I'll be with you in a second.” Taro said and finished the line he had been copying. 

“Good day.” It was an unknown male voice which greeted him. Taro settled down his fountain pen and turned around. An unknown young man with chin length blonde hair and dark eyes stood in his door, in his hand a top hat, walking stick and black leather gloves. His black dress coat and the tasteful dark green silk tie were a piece of art. His whole way of dressing and demeanor were breathtaking, he looked like coming from a city far away.  
Taro stood there speechless, he just looked at the young man who looked friendly back at him. His whole aura emanated something pleasant, fresh and new. He couldn't say anything and the young man must have realized it so he started.

“I am sorry if I have interrupted you in your work but I am looking for Mr. Akira Nakayama?”

Taro stepped forward from behind his chair but his foot got caught behind a chair leg and he stumbled. In reflex, the man dropped his hat, stick and gloves and caught Taro underneath his arms. They both caught their breaths in surprise as the young man pulled Taro up with a smile.

“You came flying into my arms like a little sparrow. To whom do I owe the pleasure? ”

Taro stepped back immediately. “I am very sorry sir.” He bowed. “My n-name is Ryutaro Arimura, I am Mr. Nakayama's copyist.” Although he could articulate quite well, his voice was still tender and quiet.

The young man stretched out his hand and Taro took it. “My name is Tadashi Hasegawa, I am a lawyer in training and I will stay under the watch of Mr. Nakayama for the following six months. Pleasure to make your acquaintance.”

And his smile was warm too. Without another word, Taro bent down to pick up the man's Top hat, gloves and walking stick and so did Tadashi. “It's all right,” the blond man said, “I got this.” Then he stoop up with his accessories and dusted them off. “I apologize for startling you.”  
Taro shook his head.

“And Mr. Nakayama?”

“He is out on business but should return soon. Shall I call for some tea sir?”

“No thank you, I'm fine.”

That moment, the door opened a second time and Akira stormed in. He settled his bag onto his desk and caught sight of the unknown young man in Taro's office. Akira walked towards them and stretched out his hand to Tadashi. “You must be Mr. Hasegawa, I received the letter from your attorney's office this morning. Welcome to Germany.”

“Thank you very much sir, it's a pleasure to be back.”

Akira smiled at him and when he pulled his hand back, Akira explained to Taro: “Mr. Hasegawa was born in Germany but raised under his Lord father in London. He is just about to end his studies in law and will return to London after finishing his thesis.”

Taro gasped and nodded understandingly. That would explain the strange dialect. 

Akira guided Tadashi out of Taro's office and took him for a turn to introduce him to the rest of his colleagues. And except some men in the office, people were very pleased about the new arrival.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

After all the ruckus in Taro's private life, Tadashi was a heaven sent. He had an easy and carefree manner about himself only a man with experience from travel could have. His way of acting and talking calmed Taro down in a way only Akira as his guardian could. They were also closer in age. Tadashi was in his twenties and Taro was now seventeen.   
Tadashi's office was far away at the end of the corridor but when Akira appointed him to work on cases together, he sat on an extra table inside Akira's office. These occasions were rare but it happened now and then. Deliberately, Akira didn't give him a desk in Taro's office because he knew that Taro needed his space and utter silence to work well. Any human proximity made him nervous.

Having a good looking English man in their team had its pro's and con's. Akira enacted visiting slots for business matters to keep the staff from 'unnecessary visits'. On the other hand there was not a week going by without gifts of sweets or cakes. They maybe even gained a pound or two. Tadashi took it with composure and smiled.  
Now and then, when Tadashi's laughter filled the room, Taro caught himself to give him attention. He just enjoyed looking at the man because he was so pleasing to the eye. His hair was golden like the sun and his chose of words always entertaining. Sometimes, he had to work long hours in the office, even after Akira and Taro had returned home but the next morning, Tadashi looked impeccable as if he had a full night's sleep. To Taro, he was a wonder.

It was one day when Taro had returned from his lunch break outside the courtyard and made his way around a corner in the office and stopped. He heard a bunch of not so friendly men in the distance and when his and Tadashi's names were mentioned, he stood still in hiding. The words and phrases were vulgar and mean, Taro didn't even understand what they meant but he felt that they were very rude.   
He wanted to step backwards but bumped into something warm behind him. Taro gasped and turned around, only to look into Tadashi's face who held his index fingers to his lips to be quiet. He listened to the conversation down the corridor and after a while, he took Taro around his wrist and pulled him with himself outside to the courtyard again.   
Maybe it was the anger which made his heart beat faster, maybe the stairs they had to take but in that moment, when they stood outside and Taro looked back at Tadashi, he knew that he hated these men for attacking Tadashi verbally. He could take it when it was about him but not this fine man.

“I am sorry...” Taro started and Tadashi turned his head back at the young man, “that they spoke so rude about you.” 

Tadashi shook his head and stepped closer and what he did was rather unexpected. He took Taro's face in both of his hands and looked him in the eye. “Listen to me carefully, you are in no way at fault. These are bad people and the are jealous. The only thing we can do is to life our life to the fullest and be happy.” Tadashi paused and smiled. “Be happy Taro, as you are a wonderful human being.” And with that, Tadashi released his face and stepped back again.

For a moment, Taro hold in his breath and only later he would realize that for the first time, he didn't wince when someone had touched him.

End of Part 04


	5. Chapter 5

Although Ryutaro was a shy and silent boy, in his head it was never silent. He heard people walking on the wooden floor above him, the electric light bulbs outside the corridor buzzing, voices from the street outside reaching his window, Tadashi skimming through documents in Akira's office next door.... all that were stimuli which he had no control over and came into his head unfiltered all the time, all at once. For Taro realizing that, it was normal. For normal raised people, strange. But he never talked about it. As long as he could work in his office alone, Taro was happy. The only peaceful time he knew was when he sat in Kentaro's garden and drew.

A sudden gust of wind closed the door of the office next to them loudly shut and Taro jolted with the pen in his right hand. He hit the ink pot and the black ink soaked his half written document almost completely. He stared impassively at the black ink spot getting bigger and bigger and how the puddle devoured his words, letters, one by one, leaving strange shapes on the paper and table. The ink threatened to drop down onto his lap and floor... that was when Tadashi stormed inside and stopped the puddle with his handkerchief. He dipped his white handkerchief into the black liquid and Taro was fascinated by the pattern, he watched him do so motionless.

“It's okay,” Tadashi said, “mistakes do happen. There is nothing that can't be replaced.” After a few weeks now, Tadashi had realized that Taro was different, in every aspect, so he tried to soothe him. And because the boy was quiet and insecure, kind people tend to want to take care of Taro. The other half? Was making fun of him. But nevertheless, Tadashi never treated him like a child.

“I will help you to clean your desk.” Tadashi continued. “Sit over there.” Tadashi pointed to a spot next to Taro's desk and the boy finally lay is pen down and moved with his chair over to the spot where Tadashi had pointed to. For outsiders, his behavior would have seemed strange. Why the obviously lower ranked copyist didn't make a move to clean up his own mess but the truth was that the situation was new and so unusual, that Taro was frozen and didn't know how to act.   
The people he worked closely with, knew that.

Tadashi left the office and came back with a wet cloth to clean the desk. He looked aside at Taro who simply observed him and the blond man smiled at him. “You have never spilled ink before?”

“No.” Taro said.

“Then you are a most gifted copyist. During my studies, I spilled ink all the time.”

Taro smiled because Tadashi always found the right words, which were of such a kindness that it was never too close but quite right.  
When Tadashi was done with the table, he took a second cloth and stepped closer to Taro. There he knelt down and took Taro's hands into his. Carefully, he wiped the petite white hands dry which were partially spotted in ink while he could feel how Taro's gaze rested on his face, after a while, Tadashi looked up. With the gaze of a scared deer, Taro looked with his almond shaped brown eyes at the handsome face of Tadashi. He loved the little mole on the blond's cheek under his left eye.   
Out of the blue, Tadashi started talking loudly but more to himself. “This outside world must be very stressful for you. All these people who are looking at you, the noises...” In response. Taro nodded silently. “What is it that you do for fun? Is there a thing that you like to do?”  
To think about a correct answer, Taro broke the short eye contact and his gaze got lost in the room. “I love to draw.”

“That's lovely, what do you draw?”

“Nature. Flowers mostly.”

“Which one is your favorite flower?”

“There is no favorite flower, I like all of them.”

“Very well.” Tadashi paused while he still hold Taro's little cold hands in his. “Would you like to accompany me on my walk on Saturday afternoon?”

Taro smiled with one side of his mouth only but hesitated. “I must ask Akira and Kentaro first.”

“Don't worry, I will do that. I will get you on Saturday afternoon and you take your drawing utensils with you.”

Now the smile reached all over Taro's face and he nodded. Tadashi smiled back at him and finally got up from his kneeling position. He let go off his hands and said: “You better wash off the rest of the ink with soap.”

“Thank you very much Tadashi.” Taro slightly bowed his head but avoided eye contact. When he made his way out to the bathroom, his usually cold hands were all warm.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Akira thought that it was a splendid idea when Tadashi asked him to take Ryutaro with him for a walk the upcoming Saturday. The boy had to get used to other people and the park which Tadashi had in mind was indeed a location Ryutaro hasn't been to before.

Until Saturday arrived, Taro could hardly sleep during the nights. Akira and Kentaro with his wife, were the only people he had contact with outside of work and going out with a colleague, to a place outside of town, was very exciting to say the least.   
Understandably, Taro was nervous and ready to be picked up on Saturday way too early. He sat on his bed two hours prior, dressed in his black and white formal clothes including his top hat. His little hands clutched his leather bound notebook and the pencils.... it was a beautiful day and his heart jumped when he heard the carriage arriving at Kentaro's home. The teacher was pleased to make Tadashi's acquaintance, he had heard a lot from the young lawyer and his appearance was impeccable. The whole family knew that Taro was nervous about the trip and they understood why but Kenken couldn't hep himself but to feel like the bride's father so to speak. Nevertheless, he wished them a good day.

During the carriage ride, Tadashi did his best to start conversations now and then and remained silent when needed. He was perfect in reading Taro and had no problems with his silence, or him being different from the rest. The young man wasn't handicapped, he was just different. Which regarding the circumstances was understandable.  
It was a quaint little park, full with people of all classes. Couples walking, children playing and families having picknicks. For Taro, it was much to take in but soon he had learned to try to concentrate on one thing only and today, that was Tadashi. The blond stopped at a little ice cream stall, he insisted for Taro to try the chocolate ice cream. Together, and each with a cone in their hands, they strolled through the park. Taro enjoyed his first ice cream very much and when it threatened to run over his hands, Tadashi handed him his handkerchief. 

“I'm sorry, I don't want to soil it. “ Taro said. 

“That's the handkerchief's purpose, it's okay.”

The glimpses which Taro stole from the taller man at his side, were obvious but he couldn't help himself. The way Tadashi moved and acted, around people, when being on his own or when he spoke to Taro, were perfect, almost studied. Everything about him seemed like a dance. How he held his walking stick in one hand, when he tipped his hat to greet people or when he pulled his beige leather gloves off his hands because of the warm weather. With him, Taro felt safe.

“You know,” Tadashi started, “you can ask me anything. Don't be afraid.”

Taro nodded. “Akira said you came from another country, how does it look like? Do the people look the same?”

Tadashi smiled. “People look very much the same and the country, England, looks very similar too. Just the language is different.”

Taro knitted his eyebrows. “Kentaro has told me about strange languages in different countries, how do you understand these people then?”

“I can speak several languages.”

Taro stopped walking and he looked big eyed at Tadashi. “Really? How is that possible?”

“Let me think how to explain,” Tadashi paused, “you must learn each word that you know in your language, in the strange language.”

“That is a lot.”

“It is! And it takes some time but eventually, practice makes perfect.” Tadashi spoke a few words in the strange language and Taro looked at him incredulously. 

“This is a wonder.” Was all Taro could add and Tadashi smiled while he gestured him to keep on strolling with him. “Do you think of your home in England?”

“I do! I wish I could show it to you some day.”

“Why?” Taro asked curiously.

“Because I know that you would love it. The most beautiful roses are growing there and the land is very green. There is a lot for you to draw there.”

Tadashi walked Taro to a white little pagoda a little outside the main area.   
The pagoda was surrounded by rose bushes and Tadashi asked: “Would you like to draw while I take a little rest?”

“I would like to do so.”

They settled down on a bench and Tadashi observed how Taro lay his drawing utensils meticulously down in between them. “Do you mind if I watch you draw?”

“I don't mind.” Taro said and he pulled off his top hat and lay it down on the bench next to him.  
From his first pencil stroke, Tadashi understood why drawing was Taro's favorite thing to do. His keen eyes saw every detail and the world around him stopped existing for a little while.

“Taro, do you remember where you come from?”

The young man stopped drawing while his eyes rested on the flower in front of him. “I don't remember anything.” And he continued drawing. He didn't want to talk about the nightmares which made no sense but still haunted him.

“Nothing at all?”

“I was kept alone in a dark little room until a strange person let me go in Nuremberg.” Taro paused again and looked up at Tadashi. “Why do you ask?”

“Because you are a miracle.”

“Why do you say so?”

His questions were challenging but intelligent. “You see the world with curious eyes. This is something the grown up people have forgotten. I admire that.” 

Taro tried to read Tadashi's face and when he had nothing more to add, he simply continued drawing. “Is that a good thing?”

“It is a rare thing and rare things are good.”

Taro nodded although he didn't really understand it. He was aware of his unusual past and about him being late in learning things but from the outside, he was human like anybody else.  
When Taro reached for his eraser, he tossed several pencils down to the ground. Hasty, the young man reached for his beloved utensils and Tadashi followed. Their hands touched unexpectedly and Taro pulled back immediately. Physical contact was still very unusual to him although Tadashi was a little exception. Without looking at Tadashi, he asked. “Why are your hands always warm? Mine are always cold.”

Tadashi picked up his utensils. “There is no reason, maybe because you are fragile.”

“Is that a good thing?”

“It's a rare thing.”

Taro paused... then he understood. “I see.”

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

It was the following week and Akira had called for Tadashi to go with him through some documents in his office together. Taro was as always sitting at his desk in the room next to them, with his door wide open and he listened with only half an ear what was going on.   
Fact was that Akira had to go on some important business trip to Frankfurt the following week to meet people there at the high court, so he and Tadashi were putting important documents together for that. They were running in and outside the office, changing from Akira to Tadashi's working space which was kind of unsettling for Taro who was in need of silence for his work but he coped with it. Tadashi and Akira had just left again when a knock sounded at Akira's door. It was Susanne and she entered with documents which Akira had requested from her earlier. 

Taro turned his head around, “Please leave it at his desk, thank you.”

And he went back to work as he had to finish documents as well. While he was continuing writing, Taro noticed that the light from his window darkened and a shadow hovered over the right side of his document. Taro looked up and realized that Susanne was leaning against his desk with a bright smile on her face, she was literally just staring at him.   
Baffled, Taro leaned back from his document and looked bewildered at the young girl as he couldn't read the situation. All he knew was that her attitude seemed rather casual for a working environment and something about that made him nervous. He just really wished that she would just leave but he couldn't possibly tell her that.

“I wondered Ryutaro, do you like to go for walks?”

Still insecure, Taro slowly nodded.

“Would you mind if-”

At that moment, heaven answered his prayers and the door to Akira's office opened swiftly and Tadashi stood in the room. He read the atmosphere immediately and the girl jumped down from her half leaning position on Taro's desk. She excused herself immediately and left the room, moving around the still standing Tadashi who looked with an ice cold glare at the girl, then back at Taro.  
Tadashi didn't say a word, maybe he was shocked about him being shocked from the situation he had just stumbled into.   
It was strange but Taro felt ashamed for no reason. He looked down on his knees and excused himself to Tadashi although he didn't know why. The steps on thick carpet were the only sounds in the room and they came closer to him. With his gaze still lowered, Tadashi's trousers came into view, then the blond man leaned down and caught Taro's gaze. 

“It's okay. There is nothing to be ashamed of and you are not to blame. The girl just really likes being with you.” 

Taro nodded and looked up at Tadashi. “I don't understand why and I feel uncomfortable every time she's doing this.” Then he felt a pat on his head.

“You are famous with the Ladies Taro.” Tadashi gave a quick smile but it didn't really reach his eyes.

“What does that mean?”

“Well,” Tadashi scratched his head. It really seemed that they didn't have 'the talk' yet and Tadashi was the last person who should do that, “maybe you have to ask Akira about that. He knows best because he is married.”

“What does marriage have to do with that?”

And Tadashi had almost pity with poor Akira.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

It was the following day and the end of the week before Akira's travel out of town the following Monday. The stress from the day before had become even more and Akira, together with Tadashi, were still doing their best to get all the needed documents together. Half of the office was working for him now and for the first time, even Taro had to experience what real stress meant at work. He also did his best and hardly looked up from his documents.  
During midday, Taro took a short break outside alone, to collect himself, get some fresh air and just to listen to the silence of the wind. Although nobody was directly stressing him out, the mood in the office influenced him as well, made him nervous.  
With one leg, Taro leaned against a cold stone wall and leaned his head back. It was a strange concept to him that people could worry so much about certain things to make their own life miserable. Not just in this unknown case from Akira, Taro observed it all around him. He didn't understand people and probably never would.   
The outside door to the main building opened and the rest of their colleagues came outside for their lunch break.... time for him to go back, to avoid verbal interaction and small talk which he was terrible at.   
Taro sneaked back in and walked up the stairs to his department. All the offices were empty now except for the last one, Akira's office. In the distance, Taro could hear him talk to somebody else but it was not in his usual, strong voice.... Akira sounded rather hushed. The second voice belonged to Tadashi and the closer Taro got, the more he got an impression that this conversation was confidential. Taro's conscience was running wild because he didn't want to pry but he feared that if he would move back now, he could possibly be heard and discovered. He was utterly insecure about what to do.... until Akira dropped his name in the conversation.

“.... it will be in Ryutaro's best interest. I am concerned about the boy. He is too famous in this city and I want him to grow up like a normal man, to live a normal life.”

“Do you think it is wise to pull him out of his familiar environment and put him in the care of total strangers?”

That was when Taro slowly stumbled back. He couldn't believe what he had just heard. Cold sweat was running down his spine and his breathing started to pace up.

Akira opened his mouth but for a moment, nothing came out of it. “M-Mr. Miller is a reasonable man and a good study friend of mine. I am sure that Ryutaro will have the best time in Hamburg.”

Walking backwards, Taro stumbled and hit the wooden wall behind him, then he turned around and darted down the corridor. It was almost in the same moment when Tadashi pushed the half closed door open and in shock, both men realized that Taro had been listening.  
Tadashi didn't hesitate and followed the young man running. It was a natural reflex to save the young man as it was unclear how he could possibly react in state of shock. Maybe he could go missing, run away from home or harm himself intentionally or unintentionally.

Taro was unbelievably fast, maybe it came with the panic. Outside in the courtyard, for a moment Tadashi thought that he had lost him. He looked around in panic and decided to try the second exit of the building which lead to the main street and next to it was the local park.  
The colleagues and strange people outside were gasping when Tadashi passed them running, they even asked what was going on but he had no time for that. In the distance, Tadashi heard people shouting and horses neighing which made him speed up even more, he expected the worst but Taro could not be seen in between the carriages or the horses. Over the crowd in the distance, he finally saw a familiar figure running into the park..... Tadashi was so out of breath and paused for a moment but he kept on tracking the young man. Entering the park in high speed, he saw how Taro stumbled in the distance and broke down.   
Tadashi kept on running to close the distance in between them and for a moment, it seemed as if everything was in slow motion. His steps didn't carry him fast enough, the ground felt sticky and people were constantly in his way. The closer he got, the more he could hear the sobs and they were heartbreaking. He had never heard someone cry like that before, it tore him apart.  
It was reflex, when he too fell onto his knees and onto the muddy ground, it was also reflex when he covered the shivering body with his arms and simply hold onto the crying bundle underneath him. Tadashi just hold onto Taro who tried to fight him off half-heartedly but eventually gave in. That was when Tadashi pulled Taro's upper body up from the muddy ground and onto his lap.   
Taro sobbed into his neck and clawed into Tadashi's ruined black frock but the lawyer didn't care. With one hand, Tadashi reached up and hold Taro's head secure against himself. He was shocked about his own reaction and kissed the soft black hair next to Taro's ear.... once, then twice. And it felt so right when he too had his eyes closed and felt with the young man. Not saying a single word, he was just there with him.

Akira found them almost half an hour later when Taro had fallen asleep in exhaustion. Tadashi stood up and carried the exhausted Taro in his arms, they both looked horrible: Their clothing utterly stained, Taro's sleeping face swollen, his hands still clawed onto Tadashi frock and Tadashi himself look battered. 

“I will bring him home.” Was all Tadashi said and Akira simply nodded when they made their way to the street to catch a carriage.

End of Chapter 05


	6. Chapter 6

It was late in the evening and the candle on Taro's little desk fluttered with the movement of the young man who sat next to his bed on a chair. The silence in this quaint little house was almost grotesque to the drama they had all experienced earlier this day. 

Kentaro was speechless when Tadashi carried the exhausted Taro inside his house, followed by Akira who explained the situation to him. It was more than tragic that Taro had to get to know about his future in that way. After everybody had calmed down over a cup of coffee, Akira made his way back to the office to finish his work and he made Tadashi stay behind at Kentaro's place to calm Taro down in case he woke up from his sleep. As a mentor to both young men, Akira realized the calming effect Tadashi had on Taro, so he encouraged him to be there for Taro when he couldn't.... that was until the young man had to leave for Hamburg of course.  
Tadashi leaned his chin on his hand and observed the even breathing man next to him on the bed. It was past ten o'clock already and despite from turning and murmuring in his sleep, Tadashi wondered whether Taro had nightmares again... like he once told him. When he jolted in his sleep again, Tadashi reached over to the bed and hold onto Taro's small hand.... and again, it felt so natural. To hold onto him, to calm him down, even when he explained seemingly trivial daily things to him, Tadashi enjoyed all of that, very much.   
Although Taro's physical appearance seemed younger than he really was, his brown, curious eyes were too wise for his age. He carried eyes which had seen too much already.   
The dreamy air he had about him was always there and Tadashi was sure that Taro knew and felt instinctively more than normal people did. Which made him a wonder.

A soft knock pulled Tadashi back into reality and Kentaro leaned his head inside and whispered to Tadashi that the bed in the guest room was ready for him. Tadashi thanked him and gestured to be there in a moment.   
The door closed shut again and when Tadashi wanted to stand up to close the curtains, he felt how his hand was being hold in place. He studied the seemingly sleeping figure inside the bed and found Taro staring back at him motionless. To be honest, for a second he was quite startled but Tadashi moved back from his half standing position and knelt down onto the floor to be on the same level with Taro's eyes. He smiled back at the young man who still didn't say a word but kept on holding onto Tadashi's hand. With the other hand, Tadashi stroke a few strands of hair out of Taro's face and he tried to smile to him but again, it didn't reach his eyes.

“Why are you sad?” Astoundingly, it was Taro who asked him this question first.

“Me? Well.....” He paused. “It makes me sad seeing you being sad.”

“Why did no one tell me about these plans with Hamburg?”

Tadashi paused again. To be honest, he didn't expect Taro to ask the heavy, intelligent questions right away and then he realized that they had treated him like a child way too long.

“We were all afraid that you would be upset. Akira wanted to tell you after his return from Frankfurt in a week.”

Taro looked down onto their touching hands but neither one of them pulled away. Then he lifted his gaze, broke eye contact and looked over Tadashi's head, Taro almost whispered. “I am sorry for causing you trouble.”

Tadashi shook his head. “Not at all. I am sorry that you had to learn it this way, please excuse us so very much for hurting you in that way.”

Taro pulled back his hand and finally sat up. He pulled down the blanket and his black hair was tousled and the white sleeping shirt crumpled. Tadashi could almost feel the warmth emanating from the sleep relaxed body. “I don't want to leave this place, I love it here. I will miss the people... I will miss you.” Taro still whispered.  
Tadashi smiled and thanked him. “There is no place like home and Akira and Kentaro made you a home here. They are the kind-” Taro moved to the edge of his bed and his naked legs dangled over the wooden frame. His white shirt was way too long for his petite body which was another detail Tadashi shouldn't care to notice. That was when Taro reached for Tadashi's hand and pulled it up to his chest over his heart. It was beating slightly faster and Tadashi was sure that his heart must feel the same. He had no idea what was going on right now but he had no power to do or say the right thing right now.

“Why does it hurt here every time you leave? Or when you talk to other people? Or when I hear you but can't see you?”

Tadashi's eyes were hazy when he looked back up at Taro's beautiful almond shaped eyes. While his right hand remained over Taro's heart, he reached with his other hand for Taro's face where he cared with his long elegant fingers over the peachy soft skin. Tadashi rested with his thumb at Taro's beautifully formed lips and realized that the heartbeat became faster. The whole atmosphere was so magical that all he could do was simply act.  
Slowly, he moved closer to the very still sitting Taro and leaned in, closer to his face. Although Taro must have no idea what this was all about, it was surprising that in natural reflex, the young man did the same thing. Their hot breaths touched their lips first until their lips finally meet. Hesitant and tender but seduced by Taro's beautiful soft lips, Tadashi started kissing him.... and again. The gasp from Taro came automatically and his sigh deepened when Tadashi pulled him closer to himself around his neck. Out of clumsiness, Taro hold onto Tadashi's collar for stability. The desperation was still there in the young man's hands.   
In the middle of their long kiss, Tadashi suddenly pulled back. Not because he wanted to but because he had to. Realization hit him hart and he shook his head. Taro still had him at his collar and Tadashi solved the grasp with his hands tenderly.

“I'm sorry. I shouldn't have done this.”

Taro was still speechless and touched his lips. This, he had never felt before. “Then why did you do it?”

Tadashi shook his head again and tried not to look at Taro. “I guess because I wanted to but I shouldn't have, you understand? Because when I will leave.....” Tadashi looked back and placed his hand back over Taro's heart. “This will hurt even more than before because we will never see each other again.”

It was a disaster.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Tadashi couldn't sleep for almost the whole night and Kentaro woke him like he asked him to, early in the morning to catch Akira in the office before he left for Frankfurt. So he was up before Taro was awake and he left the house almost in a hurry.  
This night, he had made up his mind. The recollection of this moment with Taro together... it haunted him, it almost drove him insane. Who could have ever believed it but this young man, he had him. He was totally owned by him. And the more he wanted to reason with his logical self, the more it was in vain. Tadashi couldn't leave Germany with the knowledge of Taro being left behind in a strange town with strange people. So today, he had to propose something to Akira.

It was the way how Tadashi entered the office, the look in his eyes, his steady steps, all that made Akira stop in his movements.“Good morning! How is Ryutaro?”

“Good morning. He rested quite well.”

“But that's not why you're here.” 

Tadashi pulled his chin up slightly and tried to remember the speech which he had prepared all night long and even on his way to the office. “Considering the circumstances, I wanted to make you an offer.”

That was when Akira lay his files down without loosing Tadashi's sight. “Go on.”

“I guess we all agree that pulling Ryutaro out if his used habitat could cause a lot of confusion, sadness and the feeling of loss. I understand, that you want to enable him a normal living, away from all the rumors about his possible noble birth. So why not going further? Instead of Hamburg, I could take him with me to England. Our house is big enough and he will be guaranteed financial stability. I would take full responsibility as his Guardian.”

Akira listened to Tadashi's proposal very silently. As a lawyer, he was used to question every motive behind any kind of offer, especially when it came from strangers and this came as quite a surprise. Akira said. “Allow me to ask: Why this sudden change of heart? Do you feel pity because of his reaction yesterday? Or why do you....” Akira paused but he didn't speak out loud what he assumed. If his assumptions were right, he didn't like the idea. “He is still a child. I think he should be taken care of by a scholar, like my friend in Hamburg.”

“He can have all the scholars he needs in England....”

Akira slammed his flat hand onto his desk and his glare became dark. “The boy can hardly talk proper German, his manners are still of a child and you want to take him into this elitist society which frowns upon everything that is strange to them?! Far away into a strange land where no one of us could possibly reach him? Please excuse me but this idea seems not well thought through.” Akira started pacing up and down behind his desk. “Why this sudden offer, tell me, why?” He looked back at Tadashi again who was the one that broke eye contact and Akira understood. “You must be out of your senses. He is a child of special needs, don't you dare to soil the little piece of soul that he has left. I will not approve of this relation! And this is my last word.”

“I will talk to my father after my return to England. I beg you, please think about my offer. We will make a fine man out of him.”

Akira turned his head around furiously and Tadashi bowed politely before he left the room and closed the door behind him silently.

When Akira made his way to Kentaro later that day, his fury hadn't really subsided and their conversation repeated in his head over and over again. He had to admit that the idea itself wasn't too bad, London was even further away than Hamburg but he didn't trust Tadashi's sudden interest in Ryutaro. Was it out of his philanthropic self or because of romantic admiration? He too saw the glances they had stolen of each other but dismissed them as good will and friendliness. What a fool he had been. Taro was young, inexperienced and easily impressed and hurt. This could never happen.

Kentaro's home was his last stop today before Akira went home to leave for Frankfurt the day after. He had to see Ryutaro before his departure to make sure that he was alright.  
“Kentaro my friend.” Akira greeted him and behind him, Ryutaro appeared at the entrance. “My boy.” Akira took him in his arms immediately and hugged him tightly. “I'm sorry, for everything. It was never my intention to hurt you with my decision. I wanted to talk to you after my return from Frankfurt. I'm sorry that you had to hear it that way.” Taro simply nodded in Akira's hug. “I will speak with Kentaro first and talk to you later before I leave.”  
The two grown men went into Kentaro's study.

“Tell me Kenken, when did Tadashi leave your house?”

Kentaro was surprised about the question. “Today early in the morning, to see you.”

“And did he tell you anything?”

“Well not really. He just told me what happened yesterday and nothing else. Why?”

Akira touched his chin absentminded. “He made me an offer today to become Ryutaro's Guardian, he wants to take the boy with him to London.”

Kentaro's jaw literally dropped. “That's rather unexpected. Did he tell you why?”

Akira shook his head. “He just said that he wanted to care for Ryutaro as a Guardian....” Akira looked at Kenken. “I found it rather fishy.”

“What do you mean?”

Akira paused because he didn't know how to address what he suspected. “You know, they are two young beautiful boys-”

“Ah come on! Dear Lord Akira! You're not trying to tell me-”

“It's just a suspicion. I have been with them all the time and I know that they are fond of each other.”

“I refuse to believe that.”

“And if it's true, believe me, it's the last thing I want for Ryutaro. He shall have a normal life, a normal family.”

“I agree.”

“And in this case, I will never give up my Guardianship for him. I have turned down several job offers in the past but maybe I need to relocate my family now and then I will take Ryutaro with us.”

Kenken smiled at his old friend. “This sounds like a plan. Down with the idea of Hamburg.”

Akira nodded. “Guess I have just made a decision.” Kenken clasped Akira's shoulder when they made their way out of his office. “And not a word to Tadashi in my absence.” Kenken nodded and Akira knocked on Taro's door. The young man shouted to come in and Akira did so and closed the door behind him. 

“May I?” He pointed to the bed which was the only possibility to sit next to the desk where Taro was sitting on at the moment, drawing again.  
“Taro, please allow me to speak first to ease your mind.” The boy turned around from his desk and gave Akira his full attention. “I have just decided to not send you to Hamburg. You will stay in my care further on.”

Akira didn't see the next action coming and was utterly surprised when Taro moved forward and embraced him around his throat. “Thank you, I am so glad, thank you.”

“I never wanted to hurt you with this idea. I wanted to protect you from people talking about you.”

Taro nodded and moved back to his chair again. “I wondered, whether you don't like me anymore.”

“Taro, no....” Akira took his hands. “I love you like a son, this was the hardest thing for me to decide. But I have to tell you that we have to move away from here and you will stay with me and my family. Just promise me one thing: Don't talk to anybody about these plans, not even Tadashi, you understand?”

Taro looked strangely back at Akira. “Why not? I thought he is our friend.”

“Of course he is but things which concerns family stay in the family. This is an old unspoken law, you understand? This is important Taro.”

The young boy nodded and Akira stood up. He patted Taro on his head. “I need to go. Tomorrow I will travel to Frankfurt. We will talk again in one week after my return.” Taro nodded and he went with Akira to the door. Kentaro followed them and they said their good byes to each other. Akira hugged Taro. “No sadness. There is much to be thankful for.” He touched the boys cheek and nodded at Kentaro before he made his way to the carriage.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Tadashi and Taro were alone in the office the following week and the young lawyer did his best to stand in for Akira while he was gone. Although they had left each other in disagreement, Tadashi was determined to do a good job and talk to Akira again after his return. Maybe his request had been hasty and motivated by feelings but sending Taro into a strange town to strange people was still out of the question for him.  
Before Monday started, Tadashi had wondered how he should behave in front of Taro and also how the young man would react towards him. Admittedly, his move was not the wisest but he didn't regret it either. When feelings were involved, it was never the right time, things just happened. 

He couldn't help himself but to notice Taro's shoulders jolting when he entered the office on Monday. And they greeted each other like they used to and they tried to behave like they used to but Taro's ability to look Tadashi in the face was completely lost. The young lawyer gave Taro a few documents to work on, wanted to give him space and time to get used to him acting all normal.... until midday when Tadashi pulled up a chair and sat down next to Taro's desk. The young man's cheeks reddened but he kept on writing on his document without any remark.

“Taro listen,” the young man stopped copying his document and lay his pen aside but he still couldn't look Tadashi in the eye, “I am still the old Tadashi. Please don't be afraid of me, don't be shy because of me.” The young man still didn't look into Tadashi's direction and the blond man stretched out his arm, as if he wanted to feel the atmosphere between them, until his warm hand lay on Taro's cold hand. The young man hesitated for a moment and then... grabbed for Tadashi's fingers and hold his hand too.   
Still with averted eyes, Taro almost whispered. “Is it normal.... to kiss people like that?”

As always with the straight forward questions. “A kiss of friendship is given on the back of the hand or the cheek. A kiss from mouth to mouth is only given.... well, in case of.... romantic love. Lovers do kiss like that.”

“Are we Lovers then?”

For the first time, Tadashi had no answer to that. It was almost impossible to tell Taro that this kind of Love, between the same sex, was highly frowned upon and forbidden. “Would you like us to be?” Taro thought about it and then he slowly nodded, Tadashi breathed in deeply.   
“I also want us to be together. The thing is, society and people forbid people from the same sex to be together, do you understand that?” That was when Taro pulled away his hand and with narrowed eyes, he looked at Tadashi for the first time. “No, I don't understand that, why is that? Only the people involved should matter and no one else.”

Tadashi smiled at Taro. “Exactly my words.” He crossed his legs and arms before he went on explaining. “There are people of the same sex in relationships with each other but these people keep it secret to other people.” He paused. “This is very hard, to live in secret. This means that we have to live in secret.”

Taro looked worried. “Then how is it possible?” And again, Tadashi had no answer to that. Instead, he changed the topic. “I will talk to Akira after his return, maybe we can see each other in the future nevertheless, we will see what the future brings.”

“When you are going back to England, I will never see you again.”

“Who says that? Maybe one way or another, we can stay together....” And Taro looked at Tadashi with this old wise eyes, as if he knew better but both left it uncommented. Some things, only time could tell.

“Give me your hand.” Tadashi said and he leaned forward. Taro looked as if he didn't understand and Tadashi pulled his arm closer to himself. He then removed something from his wrist and bound it around Taro's wrist. “What is it?” Taro looked at the leather bracelet where a silver anchor was bound around it. “It looks beautiful! What is it?”

“It's an anchor, a symbol of hope, strength and stability. Something we both need.”

“It's beautiful, thank you.” Taro smiled and he looked at it in wonder. He had never received such a gift before. “I will treasure it.”

“When you are sad, look at it and think of me. Be assured, I will think of you too.” Tadashi stood up but when he wanted to return to his desk, he felt arms wrapped around his waist from Taro's sitting position. He simply hold onto him which was a big step forward since Taro usually avoided any physical contact. Tadashi wrapped his arms around his shoulders and cared through the raven black hair. He leaned down and gave Taro a kiss onto his hair before he broke the contact because they were still in the office. “We need to go back to work. No one can see us like that.” And Taro did as he had been told. 

The following days, they both caught each other stealing glimpses of each other. Taro more obvious than Tadashi, stolen moments of tenderness.... a lingering hand on the shoulder, maybe even the hands but Tadashi was more skilled in it and the one who took the initiative. The more days went by, the more desperate it seemed.  
It was Wednesday afternoon when the door in Ryutaro's office suddenly closed and he turned around startled. His door was always open since Akira's office was adjoining.   
Tadashi stood there with an unreadable glare. Taro looked at him, still with his pen in hand and saw the young lawyer dropping his jacket, which was unusual behavior, then he walked towards him, took his pen out of his hand and pulled the young man slowly up from his chair. Before Taro was able to ask, he already had Tadashi's lips on his. Clumsily, he hold onto the taller man's waist and gasped sexily from the sudden contact, his heart started beating faster and what happened next felt strange.... but in a good way. Tadashi started licking his lips, slowly and automatically, he opened his mouth in reflex. What the more experienced man did with his tongue should be forbidden. Taro's knees became week and Tadashi stumbled together with him to the opposite wall, where he pined the younger man against it. That was also when Tadashi lifted Taro's arms up around his neck to deepen the contact. They kissed each other hungrily, Tadashi took him with a need which was almost too much for the young Ryutaro to take. Taro broke the contact and breathed in deeply, only to be shocked once again when the blond man kissed his trail down Taro's throat. “Tadashi.” Taro sucked in his breath and steadied himself on his shoulders. That was when Tadashi suddenly stopped and leaned with his forehead on Taro's shoulder. He whispered in a husky voice.

“I'm sorry. This is rather unprofessional. But I want you too much.”

What Taro did was so very him and cute. He cared through Tadashi's shoulder long hair, again and again. “I love your golden hair.”

Tadashi gave a breath of laughter before he added. “Thank you. I'm glad you like it.”

“Very much.” 

That was when the blond man leaned up and cared through Taro's black hair. “And I love your hair very much,” his thumb glided down over his lips, “and your mouth, and your neck.... everything.”

Taro became very shy and he had to look away. Tadashi moved back and rearranged his clothes and hair. Then he rearranged Taro's attire and gestured him that they had to go back to work. Which they did, more or less professional.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

A wind of change came the following Friday in form of a letter which was addressed to Tadashi, which was rather strange. The young lawyer took the letter from Akira's secretary and opened it in the office while standing. His eyes danced over the lines which were written on thick paper and the more he read, the darker his eyes became. It was a reflex when Taro stood up and stopped in his tracks when he saw Tadashi crumpling the letter in his hands. 

Taro looked at him but didn't say a word. Tadashi too looked back at him but didn't know what to say either. He grabbed his hair and combed the blond strands back, turned on his heel and walked through the room to Akira's desk, where he sat down behind it. Taro looked unto his shoes but followed Tadashi nevertheless. When he stretched out his hand, it was hesitant but he lay his hand down onto Tadashi's shoulder, who turned his head in reflex and leaned against it. For stability and out of sadness.

“It's from my father,” Tadashi said very quiet, “my mom is very sick, they want me to return to England.”

“When?”

“On Sunday. They already ordered a carriage for me.”

Taro closed his eyes. He had dreaded this moment since he could remember and now it was here. It was out of sadness, when he leaned down and wrapped his arms around Tadashi's throat and leaned against his head. Tadashi hold onto Taro's arms and for the first time, there was really nothing he could say.   
All he knew was that Tadashi was right: His heart started to ache from this moment on.

End of part 06


	7. Chapter 7

The timing of his return to England couldn't have been any worse. Tadashi wanted to talk to Akira at least one more time before leaving and now he would be gone before Akira had returned. Nevertheless, he had to make the best of it. That way, he could talk to his father about Taro's Guardianship and propose to make him his employee in his future attorney office.   
The main reason why he had been called back earlier than anticipated was because of his mother's health. His mother had always been very fragile and because of that she has always been more sick than healthy. In truth, Tadashi's Lord father was his step dad because his mother remarried when Tadashi was still a child. Their father-son relationship was 'cold', to say the least. Mylord was only to be impressed with status and achievements, something Tadashi had to learn very early on.

It was Saturday, the day before Tadashi's departure and he had promised Taro that he would spend his last day together with him. His suitcases were already packed and the rented apartment paid for. It were his hands now that lay cold in his lap, the white handkerchief with his initials, crumpled in his hands.... it felt surreal. Everything. At first, he didn't want to come here and now his departure seemed.... impossible and hard. Sometimes the development of 'things' were simply unpredictable. And he knew that it had been stupid when he broke into Taro's personal space, that he would hurt himself too in the process of getting emotionally attached but that's what happened and no regrets could save them both now.

Kentaro was shocked when he had heard about Tadashi's early departure from Taro the other day, Taro's mood had also dropped significantly from that day on. Akira had told him that Tadashi and Taro were fond of each other so no matter what would happen, Kentaro and his wife would have the boy's back. And besides, Akira was to return from his travel in tow days from now. He was the best when it came to solve problems and overcome obstacles.

Before Tadashi had arrived on this Saturday, Taro sat on his bed and looked out of the window, waited for him. His hands balled into fists from anticipation, no words had been spoken the entire morning. The young man had completely withdrawn into himself, he had become even more speechless than before. 

They went to the park where Tadashi had brought him before, where Taro had his first ice cream ever. And the memories seemed so old already, the moments black and white in Taro's head. He couldn't say anything when he and Tadashi went for a walk there, he had troubles to answer Tadashi's questions and the older man of course noticed. He offered his elbow to Taro and the young man linked his arm with him. Of course they gave an odd impression but none of them cared. This was the closest they could get to 'holding hands' outside.

“You are unusually quiet today. No curious questions for me today?”

Taro shook his head and maybe it was just Tadashi's imagination when the young man moved closer to him. They made their way to the white pagoda where they had been sitting in at their first visit. They settled down on one of the benches but Taro still didn't let go of Tadashi's arm. Tadashi gave a breath of laughter. “You are very clingy today.”

Taro looked even more sad and he lowered his head. In doing so, his head came to a rest on Tadashi's shoulder. The blond man looked around and since they were alone in the pagoda, he lifted his left hand and cared over Taro's cheek. “You have to promise me one thing: No matter what happens in the future, keep on going. Keep on learning, working, drawing, do everything you love... and never stop.” His hand came to a stop at Taro's chin and titled his head up so that the young boy looked into his eyes. “Promise?”

“Promise.” Was all Taro said and he averted his eyes again when Tadashi let go off his chin. They were in public, he had to keep his composure.

“I will come back for you, I want to take you with me to England.” 

That was when Taro moved back and his jaw literally dropped. He had never heard of that plan before. “To England?”

“Only if you want to of course but I must tell you that I would like to be your Guardian. Now, don't be shocked, you can still visit and contact Akira and Kentaro as often as you like. So, what do you think?”

Taro took both of Tadashi's hands. “I would like that, very much.” His eyes were radiant and his grip tight. Tadashi lifted up his and Taro's hands and kissed the back of it, not minding his surroundings.  
After they went back to their carriage, Tadashi and Taro sat opposite of each other how the etiquette demanded it. After they had left the busy street, Tadashi took Taro's arm and pulled the young man slowly over to his side. With one hand he hold onto Taro's ever cold hands while he grabbed with the other behind him to get something.

“There.” He placed a parcel on Taro's lap. “Open it when you are back home.”

Taro looked back at Tadashi and this was when he really realized that this was their last moment together for a long time. “I don't like that.”

“What? The parcel?”

“No! That feeling of.... loss. Of you going away.”

Tadashi looked down onto their hands and pointed at the bracelet which Taro wore.... and the young man remembered what Tadashi had said when he'd given it to him: When you are sad, look at it and think of me. Be assured, I will think of you too.

Taro nodded. “Thank you, for everything.”  
It was Tadashi now whose eyes showed an insecurity which Taro had never known he possessed. His eyes were glassy and his brows furrowed. It was hesitant when the older man lifted his arm and cared over the raven black hair, it was a longing that he felt when his hand came to a rest on the young man's chin. It was the pain of their good bye when he simply placed his lips on Taro's and remained there. Demanded him, again and again. Tasted and felt him before their carriage turned into the last street before their destination.  
Tadashi leaned with his forehead against Taro's for a moment before he broke the contact. That was when he realized that Taro had been crying silently. With his thumb, he dried his tears and cared over his cheeks.

“Now,” Tadashi smiled although he had trouble to do so too, “I want you to be strong, eventually everything will be okay. Be happy, for both of us.” Taro nodded and Tadashi continued. “I will write to you as much as possible.”

“I would love that, thank you. For everything.” Taro tried to smile but it didn't reach his eyes. 

“I won't say good bye, I will say 'see you soon'.” Tadashi said and waved playfully at Taro while he opened the carriage's door for him. The young man took the parcel and moved down the steps of the carriage... and when he did that, he felt how a hand rested on his back and glided down his coat, only to hold him tenderly, touching the fabric there and finally letting it go when he had stepped fully outside.

Taro waved behind the carriage until he couldn't see it no more. Tadashi didn't look out of the window nor waved back at him. He had to keep his composure together.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

After his return that day, Taro hadn't left his room for the rest of the evening. Kentaro knew about the boy's sadness and told his wife to bring him some food into his room. She did so and was surprised to find the boy motionless sitting on his bed and looking out of the window again. He didn't even react to her visit and just stared outside utterly speechless. A parcel was lying on his bed untouched.   
After she had left, Taro moved his legs up to the bed and bumped into the parcel which he had forgotten about and remembered that he was allowed to open it now. Hesitant, he loosened the bow which hold the paper around it together. Something dropped to the floor and what showed itself was a beautifully leather bound notebook and colored pencils. It was beautiful and very exquisite. And with a closer look, Taro found his name engraved at the bottom of the book cover. It was the most beautiful thing he had ever received. Carefully he lay it aside and reached for the thing which fell to the floor: A cream colored letter. He opened it and found the following words:

It is the rays of the sun which makes us rise  
It is the color of flowers which makes us smile  
It is the little details in moments which gives us worth  
and it is the heart which feels all that.  
It is the feeling of Love which let's us appreciate what we have  
and it is you who showed me all that.

He went to bed on an empty stomach with the letter under his pillow.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

After a long, lonely Sunday, during which Taro didn't leave the house, Kentaro made sure that Taro arrived at his workplace save and delivered him to the front door personally. Akira had to return during the day and Taro continued his work in the office, tried to fit in and had to answer to people when they asked about him or Tadashi.  
When Taro entered the silent office, for a moment, he stood very still with the door handle in his hand. The well known smell of the office reached him but it was the silence that nearly killed him. Now he would be all alone again with Akira, how it always used to be before the colorful Tadashi had entered his life and soul. Stoic feeling of duty brought him through the day but there wasn't much to do since no one gave him a task to work on. It was boredom when he took a book out of Akira's office library but he didn't understand the content, he tried a few other books but still he understood nothing.   
Taro observed the colors of the sun shining through his window which left a rainbow on his office carpet, the dust was swirling within the lights and time and moment seemed to stand still for a bit. He wondered where Tadashi was in that moment, what he thought about whether he had already arrived in England after one whole day of traveling....  
As the sun wandered over the sky, the colors vanished and it became darker since midday was already over. When it was time to return home, no one had come to his office and Taro left in a carriage alone. Kentaro was surprised to find Taro returning home after a whole day alone.

“Taro! I thought you would return together with Akira?”

“He hasn't returned yet.”

Kentaro looked strangely at the young boy. “I thought he wanted to come to the office today, oh well, maybe he has been hold up.”

It was the same procedure the following day. Kentaro accompanied Taro to the office but this time, he went with him inside. People greeted them, wondered why Taro came with his teacher. “I will wait with you for Akira.” Kenken smiled at Taro but the young man felt that he was kind of tense.  
An hour went by, then another one.... Kenken started pacing up and down the room, then he left the office and asked his colleagues whether they knew something about his late arrival. They all denied it. When the major was asking for Akira, Kenken knew that something must have happened. He turned to Taro and hold him at his shoulders. “Listen Taro, I will go to Akira's place to check whether he is at home. Maybe he became ill or something happened within his family. I will return to you as quickly as possible.” Kenken left in a hurry and minutes, hours of desperate waiting followed. The mood in the office had changed drastically and people stormed nervously inside, killing Taro with their senseless questions which he had no answers to. He so wished for Tadashi to be here right now, he would have found the correct answers would have told him about the right thing to do.  
Nervously, Taro started rocking back and forth with his hands in between his thighs. He so hoped that this waiting, this nightmare was about to end soon. He was nearly sick out of worry because Akira was the most reliable person he knew. For him being late was out of the question.  
It was two hours later when Kentaro arrived again. From the speed of his steps he knew that something was not all right. “Taro!” Kenken entered the office and grabbed for the young man's jacket. “We are leaving, Akira hasn't returned home from his travel, his wife is inconsolable.”

When Kenken stepped into the corridor with Taro behind him, he suddenly stopped and Taro bumped into his back.   
In the distance, he saw the major coming down the corridor and together with him was a police officer. It seemed as if time stood still, everything went in slow motion.... Kenken grabbing Taro's hand, taking him with himself back inside the office, the major and the police officer entering and closing the door behind them. They didn't say a word, Taro recalled the police officer's face perfectly, the grief-stricken eyes.... they said it all. Kentaro shook his head and the officer started.

“I am very sorry.” He pulled down his hat and bent down his head. Taro looked from the officer to Kenken, didn't understand the gesture and saw his mentor clasping a hand over his open mouth. The major turned away and Taro shook Kenken's hand in desperation. “What is going on? What happened?”  
Kenken closed his eyes, his grip so tight on Taro's hand that it almost hurt. “How?”

“Sunday evening. He was at a bar and sank down after having a drink, it was a heart attack.”

Taro's knees gave in and he sank down to the ground. His eyes filled with tears and rolled down his face uncontrollably. His sobs filled the room and Kenken sank down together with him. He hold onto Taro, cried silently with him at his head as they trembled in deepest pain.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

The following days felt like a living nightmare, the pain and loss in the air was almost palpable. They all stayed at home from work for an entire week and Kenken did his best to function. He had to visit Akira's wife, now widow, to see how she was doing and offered his help, especially with all the kids. His wife Eleanor did her best in counseling Taro but the pain was at this point just to deep. In one week he had lost almost all the people that he loved. Akira was the only father he had ever known, he was the one who saved him after his arrival, he was the one responsible for the life he had now. He gave him everything, he gave him heart and mind. Filled that meaningless body with intellect. And now he was just.... gone.  
Taro cried himself to sleep for many nights and became threateningly thin. He felt as if his body had been torn apart, his mind didn't work properly and the grief took him his ability to speak. Taro didn't speak for days.

Kentaro's grief on the other hand changed quickly to mistrust and over Akira's wife, he requested an official police and doctor report about his cause of death. In the moment Kenken heard about Akira's death, he knew that something felt terribly wrong. The timing of his death was just too perfect for any enemy he may had made. Akira was also a person who had never been ill, never. So if his assumptions were correct and Akira had really been assassinated or poisoned...

…. then Taro was in great danger and he had to leave this town asap. It's what Akira would have wanted.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Tadashi had hardly arrived two days later in England, when his Stepfather had called for him. But the young man didn't care, he went to his mother's room first to see how she was doing.  
They lived in a beautiful grand city house and Tadashi did his best in sneaking into his mother's room. He knocked tenderly and entered when no answer came. With the first step he took inside, Tadashi was shocked about the aura in the room. Everything inside felt sick and his mother lay very pale on white sheets which had almost the same color as her face.   
He sat down next to her bed and hold onto her hand which was as thin as willow branches. Then he kissed it tenderly and hold it while he observed her fragile breathing.

“It's consumption.” A deep voice said from the door and Tadashi stood up and found his stepfather standing there. With a last glance at his mom, Tadashi left the room and followed the man who went straight into his study. Tadashi closed the door but wasn't offered a seat which he took as a good sign to leave quickly again.

“Well well, I hope you had a nice stay back in Germany.” Tadashi narrowed his eyes and remained silent. “I hope that you are aware of the fact that it was out of my pure generosity to let you finish your semester there.” Tadashi had averted his look and had his arms crossed while his stepfather continued. “I don't need to remind you about your failure which I might add dragged on for an entire half a year!”

That was when Tadashi looked back at the man. “Aren't you tired of being the handyman of the house of Baden? Playing their dirty tricks?”

The man's glare became dark and when he lifted up his chin, he showed the young boy who stood clearly above him. “THIS dirty tricks pay for your food!! The clothes and study expenses NEXT to your mother's medical bills and all you had to do was to assassinate the boy and come back!! Yet you worked alongside him and during your stay you did nothing!!! He is still alive!!! The commands which we had been given were clear and now we fell out of favor with the King of Baden!!!”

“I don't see Taro as a threat-”

That was when the far taller and broader man stormed towards Tadashi and hold him at his collar. “The boy has to go, otherwise we will be bankrupt, you understand? No more town house, no more studying and carriages, nothing and your mother will be doomed to succumb to her illness.”

Powerless, Tadashi averted his face and closed his eyes, that was when the man let go of him and stepped back. Yes, it was him on that fateful night in Taro's room, who had come to murder him but couldn't when he saw his angelic face sleeping. And yes, he felt guilty every time the young boy smiled at him and even more so when he eventually came to fall for him.

“I want to make him my protege and take him into my attorney office to work for me. In doing that, he will be out of sight from the King of Baden, the rumors in Germany will stop and I have somebody to work for me. His secret will die with me, you have my word.”

Incredulously, his stepfather stared back at Tadashi. “Have you lost all your senses?! How do you want to propose that to the King?! He wants him dead! He is a threat to the throne and not his biological child!!!”

“But his mother loves him! She wants him alive and well-” A slap across his face shut Tadashi up violently.

“You are never to speak of that boy and you will never return to Germany ever again. Your failure cost me enough to uphold this house and our reputation.”

Tadashi clenched his teeth so strong that his jaw hurt. He had nothing more to add to this and turned around. He opened the door and the last sentence that he heard was:

“If you are ever to set one foot in Germany again, I will disown you and divorce your mother and you can start making plans where to live on the streets of London.”

With a loud bang, Tadashi shut the door behind him and stormed out of the house.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

It was the second week after Akira's death and Kentaro was incredibly busy in sorting out Akira's legal business which concerned Taro. There was no question for him and his wife to take over Taro's guardianship and Kenken did his best in gathering the needed documents and signatures.  
A few days after the horrible tragedy, Kenken had already written to Akira's friend in Hamburg to finally arrange Taro's departure. Now they had only one week left and until then, Kenken kept the boy inside his house. He was absolutely concerned about the boy's safety and it dawned on him that Akira must have found out something during his travel of research, although he had never told him what it was.  
Taro meanwhile knew nothing about the departure, he was also too depressed to know of any such things. But he asked about the post every day as if he was waiting for a letter but nothing came.  
Taro's nights became longer than the day, he was sleepless and haunted by old nightmares if he found some sleep. Nightmares of small dark rooms, of being followed, of shadow people. He had no motivation to stand up or to get dressed, human interaction became as difficult as it has been in the very beginning. He felt like going backwards in time, lost himself in the little child which was still inside of him. And his heartache didn't do him any favors too. Out of his memory, he tried to sketch Tadashi's face but no drawing did him any justice.... and at night, he drank in the few sentences which he had left him on paper. Rewrote them again and again. Recalled them in his head... 

It was the third week and a few days before his departure when Kenken got Taro a suitcase and cash. The boy still didn't know a thing about it which was out of precaution. Kenken would accompany Taro all the way up to Hamburg, traveling by carriage would take them about five days with stops on their way.... and during all this haste, finally a letter had arrived.  
When Taro woke up, he almost fell off his bed when he found the letter waiting on his table. With shaking hands, he ripped the letter open and read the lines hasty.  
In no time, he washed and clothed himself for going out. His fingers were shaking when he tried to button up his white shirt. The house was empty since both of his new guardians went outside and Taro ordered a carriage to go into town. During his ride, he was shaking out of anticipation, his hands were sweaty and time just seemed to stand still. The route to their well known park seemed to take forever... Taro still couldn't believe it. He would see Tadashi again! Today! In a few moments!

After he had been dropped off, Taro stumbled down the carriage and started running into the park. Clumsily, he hold onto his top hat and made his way to the pagoda where they always used to sit. People were gasping when he passed them and his clothing was all over the place but he didn't care. His heart carried him all the way to the only person he had left in this world, the person he had so yearned for.

Taro reached the pagoda totally out of breath. Tadashi wasn't there yet and he checked his pocket watch for the time. Exhausted, he sat down on their old bench and rearranged his outfit, his hair until his breathing became steady again. 

“Taro?”

The young boy stood up and turned around. Then he froze. He looked down and found the handle of a knife stuck out of his stomach. The unknown man in front of him simply turned around and left in no haste. In utter shock, Taro pulled out the bloody knife and it dropped to the ground with a clattering sound. He tried to reach the bench but sank down to the ground.   
There was no one around him, he was all alone. The blood spread underneath him and his back became all warm. His lips were cold and when Taro turned his head aside, he saw the flowers which he had been drawing, all withered. Tears streamed down his face and left a warm trace on his cold cheeks. And then he smiled, seeing Tadashi's face before his inner eyes and his poem played in his head with the lovely voice that he had.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Tadashi woke up in his much hated home in London two days later. A servant brought him his breakfast into bed and out of his private bathroom, Tadashi saw something strange laying on the tray. He went back into the room and picked it up. It was the front page of a German newspaper..... and the headline made him stop breathing and all the blood left his head. He stumbled and broke down on his bed, his hand grasping the paper. Deep sobs filled the room and the feeling of throwing up overcame him although his stomach was already empty.... from this day on, the feeling of emptiness became his life long companion, next to the hatred he felt for his stepfather.

It was eight years later when Tadashi was finally released from the much dreaded stepfather. His mother had died of consumption in the same year he had returned from Germany and that was also the year when Tadashi opened his own attorney office and moved out of the house into a much smaller apartment. But he was free there. No more shady business for royal houses, he earned money honestly.  
He never found out who had killed Taro. Most likely an unknown handyman but Tadashi was sure that the command had come from the royal house of Baden itself. Just like Akira's death back then in the day. Tadashi never believed in natural causes.  
Although it was over eight years ago, he remembered their moments together as if it was only yesterday. Working without Taro in the office was a void which he had to get used to and was never replaced. With him, the world had lost a wonder of its time.

Tadashi stepped down the carriage in Ansbach and as soon as he did that, he breathed in the air and feelings and sensations which he had long forgotten overcame him. He felt so alone here but he had to make this journey. Tadashi stopped in front of an old, well known little house and knocked. When the man of the house opened the door, his jaw dropped.

“Tadashi?”

“Kentaro, it's so good to see you.”

The two men hugged and Kenken guided the man inside. With a cup of tea, they sat down in the little living room.

“What brings you here old friend?” Kentaro wanted to know. Tadashi looked into the swirling tea water and found that he had no words for it.

“Do you still use his old room?” Tadashi finally looked up and Kenken settled his cup down and gestured Tadashi to follow him.

They had left the room untouched. It was used as room for guests but these occasions were rare. What really hit him were the drawings on the wall which had never lost their beauty. Kenken stepped inside and picked up a sketchbook from Taro's table. He handed it to Tadashi. “He would have wanted you to have it.”  
Tadashi looked at it. It was not the one which he had bought him. This book though was completely filled with drawings. “Thank you. It means a lot to me.”   
Kenken nodded and after their tea, Tadashi left them and thanked them for their care.

He was on his way to the last stop before he would return to London the following day. The way up to the graveyard felt unbelievably heavy, as if he had to drag his feet through tar. It didn't take him long to find Taro's grave because it was just like Kentaro had told him: He got the biggest tombstone. The society was unbelievably sad when they had heard about their infamous lost prince being murdered.  
Tadashi stopped in front of the tomb stone and breathed in and out deeply. In his hand he hold one of Taro's favorite flowers and Tadashi knelt down, touched the earth and closed his eyes. He repeated in his head, how sorry he was, that he was guilt ridden and that he always missed him.

There he lay down the flower for the only person who had ever bewitched him. To him, Taro would always be a wonder.

Do not stand at my grave and weep  
I am not there; I do not sleep.  
I am a thousand winds that blow,  
I am the diamond glints on snow,  
I am the sun on ripened grain,  
I am the gentle autumn rain.  
When you awaken in the morning's hush  
I am the swift uplifting rush  
Of quiet birds in circled flight.   
I am the soft stars that shine at night.   
Do not stand at my grave and cry,   
I am not there; I did not die. 

Mary Elizabeth Frye


End file.
